


It's A Beautiful Lie.

by MashuraDi



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Casifer, Cuddling & Snuggling, Denial, Dry Humping, Fluff and Smut, Lucifer Angst, Lucifer Needs a Hug, Lucifer's Cage, Lustiel - Freeform, M/M, Memories from the past, Michifer and Samifer Bromance?, Mind Games, Psychological Torture, Recovered Memories, Sexual Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Wing Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-05-04 02:15:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 29,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5316473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MashuraDi/pseuds/MashuraDi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lucifer and Michael are out of the cage, Lucifer believes it's a lie, a trick from the Cage.<br/>Now, it is a lie? Or the real thing?</p><p> </p><p>  <b>[Now with art from my friend <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/users/Renezinha">Renezinha</a> and me, in chapter 2.]</b></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone, this is one of the ideas I've been wanting to write for a while, but yeah, me and my muse to write sometimes, specially when I have to do it in english, ughh... But I've to practice and see if I can improve with it, so...  
> My friend [Renezinha](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Renezinha) is again helping me with this project as well, as my beta reader. Thank you 'bunk-buddy' <3  
> I might be late sometimes to update, so you're warned.

* * *

 

 

There is a light that, for an instance, blinds even him. And it's warm, and pure, and beautiful. And he isn't sure if he should step forward, reach a hand, and allow it to overwhelm him. He isn't sure if he should _dare_.   
But he has already made a choice, and before he can turn his face to look back at something, _someone_ , that he still believes is trapped inside the darkness, he sees white, and there is silence... And it _terrifies_ him.   
He wants to go back, but he can't. He tries to yell, but there is no sound coming out of his mouth. And he is scared, because he knows that now he has to open his eyes and look at what's in front of him, but he doesn't. He can't. He _won't_.

Under his palms he can feel, he can sense... but not as an Angel, no. He feels things as when inside a vessel. He _is_ inside a vessel, and that under his palms is... What is this?

“Grass?” His own voice comes out soft, and weak, and almost shy. He remembers the sound of this voice, and that only brings him more questions than answers.

And there is another sound, someone is getting closer, there's footsteps, and they seem to get to him as in a hurry. But the sound changes, and now it's a flapping sound. Wings?

“Brother?” The stranger said, but he recognizes this voice as well. It's the familiar voice that makes him decide that it was time to open his eyes, and face whatever's out there.

 Lucifer isn't in the _cage_ anymore.

What he sees now in front of him, is a beautiful sky, clear, and bright. Not even clouds are up there, and the sun is making a nice job on its way going through the sunset, making it all around bathe in this stunning sepia color. What was under his hands and making the skin of his vessel tickle, was indeed grass. Because he was lying on a field, and there is trees, and flowers. Even the roses he always appreciated so much were nearby.  
And Lucifer wants to relax, but he doesn't dare. Not yet, because he still doesn't _understand_ how he managed to get out this time.

“Lucifer,” says the same voice again, and now this _being_ , is kneeling beside him. The Morning star tries to focus, and he confirms that the voice was from Adam, Sam and Dean Winchester's half brother. But it wasn't Adam, of course it wasn't him.

“... Michael,” he replies, and he sits up on the grass, watching his older brother offering him a hand to help him stand. Lucifer rejects it. Michael says nothing, just looks at him, narrowing his eyes, and Lucifer could swear there was a slight trace of _pain_ in them.

But Lucifer is prideful, he won't allow himself to lower his face and look to the ground, and beg for his brother to come back to him. Not this time.

The pain of being rejected last time still burns deep down within him, and he just can't, he can't pretend that everything is _okay_ between them, he won't.

So he stands, on his own, and still isn't sure if he should give his brother the pleasure of looking at him in the face. Lucifer decides to focus his attention on the sun. He takes a deep breath, such a human feature that reminds him, once again, that he's inside a vessel.  
It was time to pay attention to that matter, isn't that right? So he gazed down to look at himself. He recognizes the clothes, and he recognizes the wedding ring he had on his left hand.

Not so far away, there was a small lake. Lucifer walks towards it, with no rush at all, and Michael followed him with his gaze, daring to chase after him until his little brother is in front of the water. The eldest appreciated Lucifer gazing down at his reflexion on the water.  
And the Devil isn't surprised to realize the vessel he was wearing, was _Nick_.

There is a slight smile curling at one of the edges of his mouth, there is sympathy, but above all, _nostalgy_.

“Lucifer,” the eldest called out for his brother again. “We should go. Look for information,” he says, but Lucifer is silent, still with his eyes on the water.

Michael takes a deep breath, and his legs move on their own, taking him closer to where his little brother was standing, stopping by his side.

Lucifer still doesn't look back at him.

“What do you want me to do?” he asks, “Did you not punish me enough back in the cage?”

And why he is talking about that now? No... _What_ is he talking about?

Michael furrowed his brows to make himself clear that he didn't know what to say, how to express how stressed and confused he was, what to do to make Lucifer stop ignoring him. And when the Morning Star finally turned his head to look at him, there's _resentment_.

There is still that one feeling that makes Michael's heart sink to the deepest, and his hands closed into fists, and the nails of his vessel want to tear up the skin.

The Sword of Heaven lowers his face.

He knows there is nothing to say.

 “I'm sorry.”

He knows that not even that will make Lucifer forget.

 “I'm sorry I let you down.”

But he has to try.

 Lucifer's icy blue eyes still are glued to the figure of his older brother's vessel, as he analyzes him. He is forcing him to talk, and he doesn't want to bring that subject up, not now. He is trying to stay calm, he is trying to understand.

“Why can you not just stop talking about it?” Lucifer says, “How can you be sure all of this it is not just another trick from the Cage, brother?” And he frowns, his eyes squinting.

“This is real, I have already checked,” Michael wants to explain.

“You do not know the cage like I do, Michael,” he spat, angrily, and stressed. “For all I know, this all could be just another lie. A _beautiful_ lie.” And he smiles with sadness, curling his brows upwards. He isn't sure if the emotions he was feeling right now were because of Nick, or if they were his own. “Why would we be free from the Cage now? It is not like Father wanted, all of the sudden, to release us out of the goodness of his heart.” And he wants to yell at him, because he doesn't understand, even if he didn't want to accept it, it looked real _enough_ for him to want to accept it with open arms.

So he sighs, reaching his right thumb and index to the bridge of his nose, as the righteous son watches silently.

Lucifer knows how God works by now, he has punished him severely for one single mistake, then why he would change his mind all of the sudden?

“This is not real,” Lucifer says, and he turns around, ready to leave. “This is _not_ real, I am not falling for it. I won't.”

“Where are you going, Lucifer?” His voice sounds concerned when he sees Lucifer walking away, and he chases after him, again.

“Away from _you_ ,” because he won't accept a cheap copy from the real thing. His brother.

“Lucifer!” He yells, a plead to stay, not to leave him behind. They should be together right now, not doing this.

But Lucifer ignores him, and after spreading his wings, he launched himself off the ground. And that's how he vanished.

Michael stands alone in the field, and releases a breath he didn't know he was still holding. He could go after Lucifer, but if Lucifer didn't want him near, is not as if he will force him to be with him.

He had to think about priorities now, and that would be working on research. So, he as well zaps away from there after a moment of reflexion that resembled to be longer, when it wasn't.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Lucifer and Michael are out of the cage,” someone said. The voice low, and husky. Dean And Sam Winchester are standing near him, as Dean leans against the hood of the Impala, drinking from his bottle of beer. He almost choked.

“What did you just say?” That was Dean.

“I can feel them, I...” Castiel tries to find the words, though his mind is somewhere else. “They are close, they are-”

“ _Here_.” Lucifer finished the little seraph's sentence, and Sam, almost by instinct, stepped back, trying to find any weapon within his clothes. He had nothing, of course. Everything was in the Impala. Lucifer stares at him. “Hi, Sam... Dean,” he turns his face to look at Castiel. “Castiel.”

“Lucifer?” And Sam is the first one questioning What The Hell?

“How the Hell you got out, douchebag?!”

“Dean...” Castiel even looked at the Winchester, he doesn't believe talking like that to Lucifer will do them any good. His blue eyes are yet again over Lucifer, and he noticed how Lucifer was staring at Dean, but then he pays attention to him.

“It's ok, I'm not mad,” the Devil says. A soft smile, almost as if taking Dean for a child. He's used to the boy's mistreats in the end.

“What do you want?” The younger Winchester doesn't have it easy, not after the time he said _Yes_ to Lucifer. Though even when he looked spooked, he also looked curious. Lucifer likes that. “How did you find us?” he added later.

“Me.” Castiel is quick to answer the doubt, after all, he is still an Angel. Lucifer can track him if he wants. Sam and Dean were supposed to be warded against Angels, so... “He was looking for me.” And he frowns at Lucifer, not getting it. “... Why?”

“I was curious,” Lucifer crossed his arms after a slight shrug. “To be honest, I believe none of you are _real_.”

“What do you mean?” Sam is back into asking questions.

“But I have to pretend it's real until it all collapses, so...” Lucifer, almost amused, settled his eyes on the boy. “The Cage... I believe you do remember how that is, Sam.”

The boy squints as well, he seems to understand, still, not completely. Dean dares to get closer to his little brother, and-

“You hurt my brother, you evil piece of crap! Now you want us to believe the Cage can even fool you?!” And Dean wanted to laugh, hard. But stops when Lucifer insists to keep his focus on Sam.

“How can you know if this is not real?”

“Because I know. I know it feels different, I'm used to it.” Lucifer replied to Sam, the image that was supposed to be Sam, calm and polite like always. “So, how about I leave you two alone, but I take Castiel with me?”

Dean is about to protest at that comment with such passion, but then Sam and himself realize that Lucifer had left. Castiel wasn't around either, seems the Devil wasn't joking when he said he was taking the little seraph with him, and that only left two Winchesters with a lot of questions, not to mention the concern and worry on their faces, especially Dean, when it is _Castiel_ we are talking about.

Goddamn Lucifer just kidnapped their Angel friend?

“Son of a bitch!”

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Where are we?” Castiel is quick to ask him as soon as they are alone. He roamed the place with his eyes, it looked as one of the usual hideouts Lucifer used to pick. From what he can remember from last time, at least.

This time though, and even when he knows Lucifer is having him on a short leash, there isn't holyfire around him.

“Hmm... Someplace near the mountains of Canada.”

That's why his vessel could sense the change in the weather, though when you realize you are near Lucifer, regarding his cold grace, things might make you wonder.

“Why did you... bring me here?”

“Please, little brother, at least you could try to entertain me.” Lucifer rolled his eyes, and since he was staring out the window of this old, building room, he turns his face to look back at Castiel over his shoulder.

“Entertain _you_?” There goes the slight frown in the seraph's features. He surely looks confused. “You really think this is not real...”

“Of course it is not.”

Castiel still doesn't get it. “Why me?”

“Are you really asking me that?” Lucifer grins, turning himself completely around to look at him with detail. He sees the younger Angel tilting his head a little, but he doesn't reply. “I prefer the company of my brothers.”

“There is so many of them right now, roaming the Earth.”

“Oh, I've noticed. But they are not you.”

“What about Sam? Why not _him_?”

That was a good one, Lucifer had to admit. But no. “It is so hard for you to understand that I wanted it to be you, little thursday?”

 _It is_ , Castiel wanted to say, but he stays silent. They didn't end up in good terms after all. “You _killed_ me.” There was no other way to express his confusion towards this, than reminding him about that.

“That was... a mistake.” Lucifer said after narrowing his eyes a little, he understands Castiel's point though. “I was not thinking straight in that moment, I was mad, and overwhelmed by a lot of things. You should have known.” And he rethinks about what he just said. "No... Why should you have?" said mostly to himself.

“But-”

“Nothing, Castiel.” He interrupted. “I still like you. You are one of the few who got to stop thinking as a little soldier,” he tries to explain, even when in his mind Castiel is just part of the Cage's torture. “You _dared_ to step out of the circle. You _rebelled_ for something.”

“I am _not_ like you,” Castiel frowns, denying something he himself, isn't sure. He sees Lucifer smiling, teasingly.

“You are not?”

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

“ _What do you mean you ain't comin' back for now?_ ”

“Uhm... What I just said...?”

“ _Dammit, Cass... What the Hell?!_ ”

“Dean... It's better if I watch over him until I find out what he is planning. And since he wants me to be around...”

“ _What if he tricks you and something happens?!_ ”

“Nothing is going to happen, I... I can tell he is not lying to me, his intentions seem to be honest, and he... He's still my brother, Dean.”

“ _He's goddamn Satan!_ ”

At this point, Castiel had to close his eyes and rub the bridge of his nose, Lucifer wasn't far from there, he was actually with his eyes set on his little brother as he tried to speak with the usual enraged older Winchester on the phone.

“His name is Lucifer...” Even Castiel is surprised at himself, and at how he seemed to want to throw a punch for Lucifer, even when he believes he probably doesn't deserve it. He has been around him for days now, and Lucifer hasn't talked much about anything in the meanwhile, but he has been good to Castiel. The Devil really seemed to want some company... Just some company. “I will call you as soon as I can. Goodbye, Dean.”

“ _Cass, wai-_ ”

But it was too late. The Seraph just hung up and kept his phone inside one of the pockets in his trench coat. He then gazed upon the Morning Star. He was a only few meters away from him, sitting down next to a tree. Castiel walked towards him, until he reached his side.

Lucifer saw his little brother approaching, and a slight smile appeared on his lips, turning his face to his left, his icy blue eyes looking up to lock gazes with Castiel, and the eldest narrowed his eyes.

“You know... I thought you would be trying to get away by now...”

“You want me to go away?” Castiel seemed confused there for a moment, and he looked even more confused when Lucifer released a soft chuckle.

“That's not what I said,” Lucifer said as a reply at first. “When I brought you here two weeks ago, I know I forced you to stay, locking you up with me and all that... I wanted to see what you would do. But it has been days now, that I stopped using my skills to prevent you from leaving...” He licked slightly his bottom lip, and gazed at the frozen lake that was nearby. “And you have not tried to leave.”

“I want to be sure you are not going to cause any trouble this time.”

“Trouble?” The Devil had to look up at his little brother, an amused grin on his lips. “Hmm... That makes me wonder where Michael might be at right now...”

“Lucifer...”

“He didn't seem like wanting to fight when I last saw him, relax, little thursday.”

Castiel then stayed silent, gazing down at his brother as he slid his hands inside his pockets. Lucifer stays quiet for some minutes, just looking away, his gaze lost somewhere, Castiel could tell there was a lot going on inside the eldest's mind. And why's that something within Cass tells him that particular look on his brother's face seemed like he was trying to keep some sorrow locked away? The Seraph decided to gaze at the lake as well, watching some birds flying around it, trying to fish. And Lucifer tilts his head a little to one side, the smile on his lips is a little wider, but he remains silent.

And Castiel finds himself so... so curious about Lucifer.  
He can even appreciate his beauty like this, because Lucifer seemed so calm, and it also brings back some of the few memories he had about him when he was still in Heaven.

Lucifer can barely remember any of it, but he knows there are some memories hidden deep inside him. If only he could bring all of it back...

“Why don't you talk to me about Sam, Castiel?”

“What do you want to know about him?”

“After he was rescued from the cage...” Lucifer takes a breath, and squints a bit. “I know he suffered, and I have some suspicions he believes I may have hurt him...”

“Well, did you not? And Michael?”

“None of us, Castiel,” he looked up at him again. “You tried once to save him, but you didn't stay for long, you could have ended up trapped in there... But still, I wonder if you could feel the pressure once inside.”

“I... did.”

“In fact, it's a _miracle_ I'm still sane...” And then the idea of him being still inside the cage, and that all of this it's just another lie, comes back to him. “Or maybe I just lost it... Maybe I'm just accepting the idea that this is real, and I am going insane...”

“This is real, Lucifer.”

“That's what the hallucination _you,_ would say.” And Lucifer let out a breath of a laugh, curling his brows upwards almost sadly.

Castiel narrowed his eyes, how to reply to that?

“But... Can you not feel me _here_? My _grace_ , for example?” And he kneeled beside him, Lucifer looks better at him as if he wanted to focus. “Or the cage as well can make you believe you are feeling my grace next to you?”

Lucifer furrowed his brows slightly, and some surprise could be seen in his eyes when Castiel dared to take his left hand. And Lucifer can feel his grace particularly strong in his touch, forcing him to take a deep breath. It was overwhelming, and maybe it was like this dealing it had been so long since the last time he felt a brother's touch, grace, and just the thought of sharing a moment like this with another Angel...

He craved for this if he was to be honest, he missed his brothers so much it _hurt_.

And now Castiel was here, and it was all so strange. Lucifer really wants to believe this is the real deal, but at the same time, Castiel behaving like this was surreal. Lucifer always saw him as a peculiar thing, but...

Lucifer moved the hand away, slowly, and he set his gaze on the lake again. Castiel blinks, not being sure how to react at first, but then he just sighs, and sits in place.

“Imagine then... that this is real,” Castiel began to say, “what would you do now that you are free?”

Lucifer hesitates to answer at the beginning. “I just want some peace...”

He closed his eyes just for a second, and maybe the simple question brought back one of the memories he thought were lost.

 

//////////////

 

“ _What does it mean, being free?”_

“ _It means you can do whatever you want.” Lucifer replied to a young fledgling that was sitting by his side. The tiny little wings on his back also made the Morning Star look at them with a little smile. More when the little one seemed excited about something, he just flapped them faster. He still couldn't fly, thing that made him look even cuter._

“ _Really? That sounds like a lot of fun!”_

“ _But we were not created to be like that, we will always have to follow orders.” Thing that makes him think about it as he explains it to his younger brother._

“ _But I want to do whatever I want, too! Why can't I?”_

“ _You will understand when you grow up, Castiel.”_

_Little Cass made a funny pout, and Lucifer chuckled. He reached both hands to take the little ones from Castiel, and pulled him closer, hauling him up to his lap. Lucifer wrapped his arms around him later, Castiel laughs and smiles happily. Lucifer remembers sensing the happiness coming from the little one through his grace, it was so pure, and innocent. He even remembers how the brush of his feathers felt against his chest, so soft, and soothing._

“ _I want to be like you when I grow up, brother.”_

“ _We will have to see about that, little thursday... “_

 

  
[Art made by [Renezinha](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Renezinha)]

//////////////

 

 

Lucifer wondered if Castiel remembers about that? He was too young, and even Lucifer had trouble to remember about it just now, but... It was something. And it was about the two of them together.  
Looking at the little one now, noticing how much Castiel had grown, made him _smile_.

Castiel furrowed his brows, curiousity taking over his features, why was Lucifer looking at him like that? He blinks in a cute way, and then, seeing the look in his eyes was getting intense, Castiel felt the cheeks in his vessel getting a little warmer. “Is there something wrong?” He still can't control his emotions properly, but he does know that Lucifer was something special. Ever since the beginning, and even after his rebellion, it was still him, somehow.

“It's nothing...” Lucifer says, and avoids having to look into his eyes again. A moment later, he was standing from his place, and he can feel Castiel's gaze on him, following him.

“Where are you going?”

“I was thinking about stretching my wings for a while,” he looks down at Castiel, smiling again. “Do you want to join me?”

Castiel stood up, still confused. He was supposed to follow and make sure everything was alright, so... even when he still had doubts, he had to accept the offering. He nodded.

Lucifer reached out a hand to him, wanting to hold his hand, and when he does, Castiel's eyes opened a little wider in surprise. The gesture was maybe too intimate when the little one still sees Lucifer as an enemy, but Lucifer couldn't give a damn about that. If Castiel was going to stay to keep tabs on him, then so be it. He wants to go with him? Then they should fly together, close to each other, so Castiel could keep up with his older brother's speed.

The sound of wings launching them off the ground was the last thing it could be heard before they disappeared.

  

**~**

 

Another week went by and Castiel, for once, decided to give Lucifer some space, and took the opportunity to go back to the bunker, and let the Winchester boys know about the situation. Lucifer didn't mind, Castiel promised he would come back tomorrow. And for some reason, Lucifer believed him.

There wasn't much he could do now that he was alone, and the only thing that worried him is that being like this, it meant his mind would take him somewhere. He needed to keep his mind busy with something, being alone is not good, not when the memories and pain from the cage seemed to chase after him constantly.

He could try looking for his older brother, but he technically ran away from him, believing him a lie. What if he was actually the real thing, and he just left him behind? Well... He can always use the excuse he's still mad at him, which he is, but... Michael looked like as if he wanted to be with him now, try a new path, maybe? Do things differently.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes, and gazed up at the sky. It was still early, maybe he can use the time to watch the sunset, allowing the warmth of its light to warm his frozen wings. That's something he can enjoy. Then maybe he can try spending his time in something else.

 

 

The ocean was another view the Morning Star seemed to appreciate. All about Earth, in fact, its nature,it was all beautiful. And this spot he chose to rest and watch the sunset, was particularly perfect.

In his curiosity to want to experience more in his human vessel, Lucifer took off his shoes, and sat down in a big rock. He looked with interest at his naked toes, and enjoyed the sensation of the sand against his skin. He can't sense if the sand is warm or not, because the coldness in his skin makes him believe it is warm one way or the other, anything seems to be warm in contrast with his own temperature. Even his hands, he takes a moment to see how the stone's rough texture feels against his palms. He analyzes it with detail, his movements are slow, brushing the solid surface with his fingertips. The rock feels warmer than the sand at least. Lucifer pressed his lips into a thin line, and then directed his attention, once again, at the sun. It was there, the sunset, finally.

The Devil stood on his feet, and climbed the first rock, his movements just like any other human, he walks, he even jumps from one stone to the other, and it's curious to realize Lucifer seems to be smiling at this. The smile is barely noticeable, but it's there, and maybe not even the same Lucifer is aware of it.

After a couple of minutes of just feeling the rough texture of the stones under his bare feet, he stops at one in particular that seemed solid and firm enough to stand, and sit for a while. He doesn't sit yet though, he stands in place, with his eyes fixed on the sun. The Morning Star takes a deep breath, and just watches, quiet, and manifests his wings. He spread them wide, wanting to feel the light against his still damaged feathers, and he realizes it has been a while since the last time he could do this. The cage was so confining after all...

He waits for the change, for his feathers to start feeling something, a slight trace of warmth in between all that ice. But he doesn't, not _yet_.  
Lucifer is patient, he can wait, he will wait for the change to come.

But the sun is already hiding behind the mountains, and Lucifer tries to focus his gaze on the beautiful colors that are left behind. The orange, the red and yellow... The purple and even the darker colors that now announced it was time for the night to arrive.

His feathers shiver in anticipation and, for a moment he thought he felt something, but it wasn't like that.  
Unconsciously, he dragged them a little closer behind his back, they were still spread, but not like before...

   
[Art made by me.]

Lucifer waits, so he _waits_.

He waits for the _change_ , even when he knows it will never happen. The silhouette of his vessel as the darkness falls over him, his wings can be seen just faintly through the small light the nature was still allowing...

He waits,

… And waits.

 

And _waits_...

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

We could say the day started in a really peculiar way, with the eldest Winchester shouting at the sight of Lucifer sitting on the floor of the bunker's library, reading a book. Castiel was supposed to be there, but he left for a moment to look out for something that was, apparently, inside Sam's room. Dean didn't have it easy knowing the Devil is aware by now, _where_ are they hiding. And he finds even extremely weird the idea that Sam didn't think it was necessary for them to leave the bunker. Dean said it himself, it was like their _home_ , and even if they left, Sam knew the Devil was going to find them sooner or later, because apparently now, Lucifer and the younger Winchester had a stronger connection after being _one_ the last time.

“You can't be serious,” Dean frowned as he tried to talk to Sam inside one of the rooms nearby the library, trying to lower his voice since _freaking_ Satan was just there, only a few meters away.

“I don't know what you want me to say, Dean. Thing is, Lucifer isn't lying. And even when I'd love to say to you that he _is_ , he is not. ” Sam sighed, “We do have a... connection.” He even said the last word as if he was partly ashamed of the situation. The word _connection_ I mean, was kind of deep, right? It had to be. “Ever since I said Yes to him, something happened. I couldn't feel it before because he was in the cage, but now that he's here...”

“But what do you mean? Do you feel something, or _how_?” His brother is frustrated, scared, even.

“It's hard to explain, it's just... _something_. As if I could feel him when he's nearby.” Sam closed his eyes there for a moment, and then gazed at Lucifer who seemed focused on the book as he passed the pages with no rush at all, then back at his brother. “Look... The sigil Cass carved on our ribs maybe still works for you, but not for me.” Sam's brows curled upwards slightly, and he releases another breath. “He can find me now.”

Dean didn't want to believe this bullshit, that only meant trouble, right? Sam could tell Dean isn't having it easy by the way his eyes talked to him, the way he looked at him. And surely the way his older brother was breathing, didn't help. “This is bad, Sam... _Really_ bad. What are we gonna do? That means he can go after you whenever it pleases him.”

“Maybe... it's not _that_ bad.”

“What?” Now the expression in the older Winchester is even funny. The way he lifted his brows, and the gesture he makes with his hands... Hilarious. “Excuse me, I thought I heard you say this might not be _that_ bad?”

“Lucifer, if he wanted to do something, don't you think he would have already done it by now?” Sam narrowed his eyes, Dean looked at him, doing the same. “It has been a month since the last time we saw him looking for Cass.”

“It means nothing. Maybe he's just waiting, what if he's trying to get closer to you now, so later he can convince you into letting him _in_ or something?” Dean wanted to snap, he's angry, and staring at his baby brother's face, seeing his expression as if he really wasn't that worried, makes him want to break something. He wanted to shout, and yell, and ask goddamn Lucifer to get the hell out of their home.

“So... With this you're saying you don't trust _me_.”

Dean couldn't find the words, he just does a gesture with his right hand as saying, _No, it's not that!_ But the words to confirm it never left his mouth.  
  
Sam kind of snorts, and gazes down at the floor for a moment, nibbling on his lower lip, looking away, and taking a deep breath, hands on his hips. When he finally feels he can talk again, he chooses _not_ to. He walked away, and Lucifer finally dares to forget about the book for just a second, and look for Sam with his eyes when he hears his steps going up the stairs.

He watches Samuel going out of the bunker, and then Dean is interrupted by Castiel. They talk, even when Dean isn't in the mood for that. Lucifer doesn't say anything, he lets them talk, and instead of waiting for Castiel to return to his side, he stood up after leaving the book in the table nearby, and went outside as well.

No one had to be a psychic to realize that the Devil's intention was to go after his one true vessel when he, as well, took the stairs.

 

Sam was in the garage, looking for something inside the Impala, when he felt Lucifer's presence getting closer.  
That feeling he was trying to explain to his older brother, it was there. Of course that for Sam it was different than it was for Lucifer, because Lucifer could feel it even way better, Sam could be in another part of the world that Lucifer would just know.

Now, Sam almost hit his head against the car's roof when he saw Lucifer staring at him from outside the Impala, and if it were Dean was there, he would have probably laughed at him. But not Lucifer. He narrowed his eyes, and crossed his arms, circling the car to get closer to Sam, while the boy was now shutting the car's door.

“I must apologize, I should have told you I was there.”

Sam wanted to laugh, having Lucifer there, talking to him like in the old times, was still odd. More after the things he believes the Devil did to him in that horrid cage.  
The Winchester is still cautious about him, even when they have no evidence yet, of Lucifer planning to do something against them, or the same _world_.

“Were you in need of anything?” Sam tries to be polite as well in return, and Lucifer can tell Sam isn't comfortable with this, and he doesn't blame him.

“I just wanted to talk,” of course, same old song. “You know, I heard most of that discussion you had with your brother.”

“Of course,” Sam was quick to say, looking somewhere. Again, the boy feels a little embarrassed, mostly because it means Lucifer heard him say he was thinking something positive about him this time, and not just saying the Devil was there to _harm_ them. “Of course you heard.”

Lucifer furrowed his brows slightly. “It was not my intention,” he tried to explain. But the acute senses the Angels had...

“I know,” was the reply, and lucifer thinks if Sam's for _real_? When all of them, basically, just can't trust him. Sam can tell then that Lucifer is curious about that answer, but he doesn't want to dig into the matter, and he doesn't know what else to do.

Lucifer is gentle enough not to push into it, and just stares inside the Impala, noticing the little things the car still had inside. Things that made the Winchester's car _theirs_.

Sam starts finding the silence a little uncomfortable, and he feels that getting outside the garage, leaving the Devil behind, would be rude.  
Again, he wants to laugh at himself, but he can't.

“So... I'm heading out,” he said, and Lucifer locked gazes with him again.

“Can I join you for a little while?”

The boy was caught by surprise with that comment for an instant, not being sure what to say, but in the end he thought _Why not_ , right? The Devil didn't seem dangerous, as he said before. He had to look at the whole matter a little deeper. He also thought it was an opportunity to _analyze_ him. “Huh... Sure.”

Sam opened the garage's doors, and took his own car. He travels with Dean when they are working and all, but when he's on his own, he doesn't touch the Impala. There are things that would never change, and he can even picture Dean complaining if something happened to his car under Sam's watch.

Lucifer, if it weren't obvious by now, isn't like Castiel, who just zaps in and out when it comes of getting inside a car. He remembers asking him years ago even, how was it like to travel inside a _car_. He obviously asked the little one as in a way to mock him, because he knew he was _lying_ to him, and seeing Castiel actually trying to reply back even to that question, made him point that out the _peculiar_ thing he was.

And now he was opening the door, and taking a seat beside Sam in this car, in the copilot seat. Closing the door later, he looks forward as the boy takes off.  
  


Sam drives, and he's silent. He looks curious though, watching Lucifer looking at the front, then at his hands as the car moves, and how the car's movement made him feel through his vessel. Lucifer's right hand finds the window crank, and manages to open the window. Just half of it though, it was enough to feel the wind against his vessel's face.

The Winchester feels like he should say something, but he doesn't know what, or how. And because of this weird situation, poor Sam isn't aware he should be paying more attention to the road. Lucifer is even more aware of this when he feels something, and he looks forward.

“Slow down,” Lucifer said, but Sam instead of doing that, tries to focus better on the road, only to see something jumping on them.

It was a dog, and Sam would be damned, but he actually hit this one, too.

“No... No, you gotta be kiddin' me!” Sam yelled, frustrated, soon after he stopped the car abruptly. He opened the door and got out, Lucifer following right behind.

When Lucifer reached Sam's side, the boy was trying to help the poor animal. The dog was _dying_ , and Sam felt horrible, he totally forgot he was with Lucifer there, and didn't even ask for his help. He was just, trying to carry the animal, and take him with him inside the car. Maybe he can try to save this one too.

Lucifer stares at him, narrowing his eyes. 

“Sam...” He called, but Sam isn't looking at him. “Sam,” he insists.

“Not now, Lucifer, can't you see I need to fix this?”

“You don't have to do that.”

“What?” Too distracted to even think, but when he feels the Devil again beside him, and one of his hands reached for the dog, Sam realizes, and for one second his breathing relaxed.

Lucifer 's hand shone with bright white light, and a moment later the dog was fine. It looked at Sam in the eyes, and Sam was quick to put it on the floor again. The animal waved its tail, and Sam showed a smile.  
No, in fact, Sam laughed. _Happy_ because the animal was alright, he didn't _die_.

Lucifer looked at him, and he seemed to like what he sees.  
The feeling of wanting Sam to be happy, was still there. And seeing Sam like this, makes him feel good. Sam is happy, and Lucifer can feel it deep inside him.

“I, uh...” Sam lifted his brows, and then looks at Lucifer in the eyes. The smile was still there. “Thanks for that,” he said.

Lucifer smiles. “It's okay.”

There was a problem now though, the dog was being too friendly to Sam, and it was as if he had just chose him as his owner or something. He tried to lick his face, Sam continued laughing and petting the animal on its head. Lucifer just stares at this.

“I can't take you with us, buddy, my brother would kill me.” The Winchester said, and Lucifer tilted his head to the side just a little.

“You know he cannot understand you, right, Sam?” He teased, and the dog decided to be friendly to the Devil now instead. Sam didn't reply to that comment, but smiled amused when the dog tried to call Lucifer's attention, and licked the hand that he used to heal him.

“Hmm... Seems he likes you” Lucifer narrowed his eyes, and tried to pull his hand away. Sam rolls his eyes, and stands up. “You could try to be friendly with him as well, you know?”

“You want me to?”

“What kind of question is that?” Sam furrowed his brows in question, and sees Lucifer shrugging, and then daring to pet the dog's head.

“I'm just saying, I believe I did enough for this animal. Why encouraging him with caresses?”

“Just _because_ , Lucifer.”

“It would only make him believe he can come with us, don't you think?”

And the Devil had a point. Sam can't argue with that, but... “The dog will understand in the end, because we're not taking it with us.”

Lucifer doesn't try to push the dog away or anything, he just followed Sam inside the car again, and the dog chases after them. This time Lucifer zapped inside the vehicle, not giving the animal a single chance to get inside, and so he tries by the driver's side.

Sam rolls his eyes.

“No, boy, no... Out. You _can't_ come with us.” He can even hear Lucifer laughing softly, and Sam looks back at him. “What?” He knows the Devil found this amusing, and he can't say he didn't end up being _right_.

“Nothing.” Lucifer shrugs again, and stares at Sam, just waiting until the boy managed to get out victorious in the mission to make the dog understand, he couldn't go with them.

After a moment of just trying, and make sure the dog was at a considerable distance from the car so Sam wouldn't hurt it again or something, he took off again, and continued driving until that one store he was trying to reach since the beginning.  
Trying to maintain a healthy diet sometimes frustrates even _him_.

 

 

By the time they are back into the bunker, it's already time for lunch. Dean tried to prepare some burgers, and even Castiel looked excited. Even when he finds problems every now and then to get used to the taste, he was still wearing Jimmy as his vessel, and the vessel somehow dragged Castiel into trying meat, especially burgers.  
Castiel still prefers the taste of coffee though.

“I was starting to get worried,” Castiel said to Lucifer, as soon Sam walked past him, and meet his brother at the kitchen. “Something happened?”

“Well... Sam hit a dog.”

“What? With _what_?”

“With his car, little brother.” Lucifer furrowed his brows a little amused. Already listening to Dean being annoying, and demanding answers from Sam about where the Hell he was. He finds no surprise in the fact Dean was worried for his brother.

Castiel blinks, then narrowed his eyes, seeming concerned about the animal now.

“The dog is fine, I took care of it.” He now sees Castiel smiling a little, Lucifer liked that.

“Dean is preparing lunch, maybe if I ask... We could stay.”

But Lucifer was thinking it was better to leave, at least for now. He now knows that even Sam was more used to the idea of having him around or whatever, but Dean, Dean was another thing.

“You stay, Castiel, I'm afraid Dean wants me away from here, so they can enjoy their meal in peace. We can meet later if you want.”

“But-”

“It's okay, really... I know you enjoy the company of the boys, and I'm not trying to drag you with me all the time when I know you also want to be with them.” Lucifer stares at Castiel, releasing a breath, narrowing his eyes. Lucifer smiles, and reaches a hand to cup one of his little brother's cheeks, he caress it gently with his thumb. “Find me later, I will take you someplace nice.”

The little Seraph smiles, not only at the touch, but at the words. He nods, and Lucifer leaves.  
Castiel comes back inside, and reunites with the Winchesters.

 

 

**~**

 

 

It's late in the night, and Lucifer is once again, alone. Sitting at one of the strongest branches from a tree, he's staring at the moon... Wondering why Castiel didn't try to contact him yet.  
The Winchester boys could be a _strong_ distraction for the little seraph, he thought.

“Maybe tomorrow...” He said softly to himself, as his icy blue eyes wandered the stars in the dark sky. The view was beautiful, he will never get tired to see the sky at night.

The flapping of wings then let him know someone arrived, and Lucifer didn't have to look at this being to know who it was. It wasn't Castiel, but someone _Oh_ so much _older_ than him.

He didn't say anything, just stood there for a moment beside Lucifer in that branch, and then sat down. Lucifer still didn't look at him, but a little smile formed on his lips when Michael decided to do the same, and stay quiet. There was no need for words, at least, not right now. The eldest knew Lucifer was just enjoying a moment of silence, and he wasn't going to break it right now.  
The eldest can wait some minutes, or maybe even wait for Lucifer to be the first one breaking it.

It didn't take much time, Lucifer thought Michael was being nice enough just for not allowing himself to start asking questions as soon he sat down beside him.

“I thought it would take you a few months to try to contact me again,” the younger said, and Michael half smiled, gazing down at the ground.

“I wasn't sure if you wanted to see me, after last time...”

Lucifer narrowed his eyes, and doesn't reply to that by now.

Michael looks at him, waits a moment. “Do you still believe this is all part of the cage?”

“Well,” Lucifer ran a hand through his face, in the end letting his index finger poking his own bottom lip, even biting the nail, spitting part of it later. “I don't believe it is not.”

“And what are you doing spending so much time around Castiel?” Michael narrowed his eyes, he has been watching over him time to time, and Lucifer is aware of it. “If this is all a lie to you, you should not be trying to get close to anyone. Isn't that right?”

“Spying on me, brother?” The Morning Star grins.

“I'm curious, and I have to make sure you are not planning anything now that we are free.”

“A lie or not, I have to pretend it is all real. This can take years, and I can get bored.” He chuckles though, about the comment Michael said later. “I have no reasons to start anything as long you don't come to me, in search for a fight.”

Michael furrowed his brows a little, hearing his brother. If things are good enough, they won't stop arguing again about that old matter.

“You and that stupid mission...”

But Lucifer had to keep poking on it, even using words that made Michael remember _who_ he was.

“You should stop your blasphemy, Lucifer.”

Lucifer laughs, loudly.

Michael had to control himself, he was trying not to argue with Lucifer. “I'm starting to think this was a mistake, I shouldn't have come.”

“You can be hilarious sometimes, Michael,” Lucifer said, softening his voice, still avoiding having to look at him though. “You come here, and use the excuse you are watching over the things I do just in case I dare to do something _wrong_. The so called _righteous_ son, you don't even realize that if you still were the _old_ you, you would be trying to fulfill that mission. You already rebelled against Father's order, by letting me be. _Stop your blasphemy_ , you say... But I'm not saying anything but the truth. Father was unfair, that mission was cruel. _Stupid_.”

And Michael finds trouble to answer that, still, Lucifer's words do annoy him. “I'm trying to make the right choice, since apparently last time I _failed_ ,” He tries to reason that old situation, and how they ended falling together into the pit. He even doubts if _free will_ was an illusion in the end, or not. Things should have ended with that fight, but it never happened. “I have to wait-”

“For what? For Father's new command? A _sign_?” Lucifer laughs a little. “Did you not hear the news? Father isn't there anymore. He won't answer to your prayers, he has abandoned us all.”

“Because of _you_ , he left.”

“Oh no, we are not going to start that all over again.”

The Devil decided to shut up then, and Michael had to do the same. Maybe it was time to leave, for now. Go back to Heaven, see what else he can do.  
  
Lucifer knows Michael is not going to return to his side, and since he isn't allowed in Heaven... What is there to do? Things would never be the same again.

The eldest stood, and spread his wings behind his back, ready to leave. He takes another deep breath. Lucifer does nothing to stop him, of course.

“Come back anytime, brother. You know how to find me anyway,” he teased.

Michael gazed down at him for just a second, and then he was gone.

Lucifer was smiling, though that smile left his features a moment after his brother left. Another deep breath from his part, and he could tell something was new, well, not _new_ , but something he thought he wouldn't feel this time, coming _back_ again.  
Gazing down at his hand, he noticed there was a new color. A new shade of purple at the back of his right hand, and the sensation that his grace was burning his vessel, slowly. Very, _very_ slowly this time, but it still was happening.  
It would make sense, he thought. He was wearing Nick. Then again, if this was all a lie, maybe this time it all wanted to reach an end faster, or just make him suffer before his time comes.  
And if it was real, it would be just the normal thing to happen, unless... He finds a way to make Nick stronger for him.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

 

It has been days since the last time he saw anyone, and Lucifer just decided it was time to have some time alone. Take a break, not even having to think about Michael, the Winchesters, or even Castiel. It was easier proposing the idea than actually do it. He couldn't help it, but the Devil's mind usually takes him somewhere...

He thinks of Michael.  
  
He wonders if he will dare to come back for him, to fight, or to try to fix it all. Lucifer is usually dragged to believe that Michael just wanted him out of sight, that even if he tried to make things better, he will always see him as the black sheep that he is. Waiting for his little brother to do something wrong, again.

Lucifer thinks of Sam, and at the edges, probably Dean as well.  
  
He remembers their last encounter, and the fact that Sam for once, smiled at him. He thinks of the possibilities, and he's allowed to dream. Not that it will ever happen, Lucifer has grown tired to time travel and take himself into the future to see what's going on in there, but he can't avoid the beautiful idea of that maybe, someday, Sam could look at him for what he really is. That maybe someday Sam will say Yes to him, just for the sake to be around, because he missed him, accept him, embrace the feeling of being complete... But Sam would prefer to die before accepting the mere idea of being one with him, and so Lucifer releases a soft laugh.  
Sam would always pick Dean, and probably everyone else, before him. And it's ok... He thinks it's ok. At least Sam had someone he could count on, no matter what, and that's why he still respects the Winchesters.

And he thinks of Castiel.

He wonders what he is doing now? Missing his presence was something he wasn't expecting to feel. Sure, he liked to have him around, Castiel ended up accepting him this time around, maybe way easier than he could ever expect. Hell, he even looked for him time to time, to see how he was doing. Coming for a visit? It was adorable.  
The Morning Star finds himself smiling at the thought of that little Seraph.  
And then he narrowed his eyes, gazing at the ground, and at his right hand.

He shouldn't be feeling like this, he shouldn't allow the lie to take over him.

This. Wasn't. Real.  
  
This is wrong. This will _destroy_ you, he thought.

He closed his eyes, and took a moment to hold his breath.  
Lucifer laughs, again with the human reflexes...

 _You will end up loving him more than you should, and then he will tear your heart apart.  
_ _It has happened before, Morning Star..._

Great, and now he has his own voices inside his head. This was great.

_Father..._

Lucifer stood up from the green grass covered in snow, and started to walk away, slowly.

_Michael..._

There was a small frown showing up, he tried to ignore his own thoughts.

_Gabriel..._

He tried.

… _Sam._

But he couldn't.

 

He won't let this happen. He wasn't going to get attached to Castiel now. It was useless anyway, he is not real. None of them were real, so it's fine... He just has to wait for this world to fall into pieces. He just has to wait.

But waiting this time, could get so frustrating...

It was starting to hurt, again. His vessel slowly falling apart, and he thinks he should allow himself to believe it was all real, and find a way to make his vessel stronger. _Call some of your children, drink their blood_ , he thought, but doing that was so... so disgusting.  
Perhaps there is another way to make his vessel stronger...

_Get up..._

Instead, he sat down in the ground.

_Get up!_

His back against an old oak tree, the snow slowly covering him since it was snowing, again.  
He's losing hope. The Morning Star prefers to stay there, quiet, in silence...

' _I just got to wait... For this world to end._ '

Closing his icy blue eyes, Lucifer opted to suffer in silence. He releases a soft breath, it came out a little shaken. And he had to open his eyes by mere reflex, he didn't like the darkness that usually comes when he closes his eyes, when he's inside a vessel. He needs the light, he craves the light.  
So he looks, it doesn't matter where, he just looks... somewhere.  
He won't close his eyes again.

And it is so _cold_...

He isn't sure how much time has passed since he landed in this place.  
He isn't sure how much time has passed since he closed his eyes _again_.

 

“Lucifer...” The whisper came. He knew that voice. “Lucifer.” The voice repeated, but Lucifer is having a hard time with just having to open his eyes.

A warm hand is now on his left cheek, and he shakes slightly. Another hand cups his other cheek, and he has to open his eyes.  
He sees Castiel in there.

“What are you doing in this place, brother?”

Lucifer wants to cry.  
How did he find him?

“You are not real...” He said softly, narrowing his eyes. The icy blue almost looked as white as the snow, his blond hair damp and cold, and not only because of the snow.

“We need to get you out of here,” Castiel says, and he wraps an arm around Lucifer's waist. He helps the eldest stand on his feet, but the Morning Star leans back against the tree, his back looking for support in there.

He is so _tired_.

And then the little Seraph sees the condition in his older brother. He sees the burn marks in his vessel, in his hands, he wants to see more, see every little damage, look for details, but he doesn't want to do it here. “I'm getting you out of here,” was the last thing Lucifer heard Castiel say, before closing his eyes again, and lose himself into a deep sleep.

 

* * *

 

 

He shivers again, even when he can feel they are not in the snow anymore.  
Lucifer doesn't understand why he shivers in the first place, oh no, wait... He _knows_.

“This is not real,” he says in a whisper, before parting slightly his eyes open again. 

Castiel was there, beside him. And they were back into the creepy motel room Lucifer occupied weeks ago.  
Castiel was... Wrapping his wings around him, as if wanting to protect him, as if wanting to make the Devil feel better.

“This is... not real.” He repeats. He isn't aware his eyes are now a little wet.

“Stop saying that, Lucifer,” Castiel says, he was allowing Lucifer to rest his head over his legs.

He was so warm, and Lucifer _craves_ that warmth.

And then he seems to realize what was happening, he was showing himself weak before the little Angel, and he can't allow that. Besides, he already said he wasn't going to let this lie, _win_.

So he sits up, and he avoids having to look at Castiel. Castiel looks at him the whole time, and at first he isn't sure what to say, one of his wings is still around Lucifer, and Lucifer as well, tries to avoid having to look at it.  
But it was such a beautiful _temptation_...

“You shouldn't have brought me here,” the eldest spoke, and the younger furrowed his brows a bit.

“You were... alone, letting the snow cover you as if you just... did not care,” was the reply. “I couldn't leave you there, besides, your... condition.”

“What about it?” Lucifer tried to stand, but there is a hand now gripping his left wrist. Castiel pulled him down again and he kneeled on the floor before him. Lucifer has now to look up at Castiel, Castiel was frowning.

“Your grace is burning your vessel. Why are you not drinking demon blood this time?”

“What for?” He insists, he knows Castiel already knows why. “I'm not going to fall for this.”

“Good things do happen, brother.”

“Not in my world.”

Castiel is silent for a moment, and when Lucifer remained persistent into looking directly at his eyes, he decided to reach both hands again to cup his cheeks, he leans to place a soft kiss over his forehead, mimicking an action that was more something Lucifer would do with the people he loves... And he was afraid to close his eyes to enjoy the sensation, afraid the darkness would end up swallowing him.

“You remind me of Dean sometimes...” He hears Castiel say, and he isn't sure if he should take that as a compliment, or as an insult.

“Is that the reason why you are this close to me now?” Lucifer squints his eyes, looking bothered all of the sudden.

“No, I... “ The Seraph can feel Lucifer's cold hands holding his wrists, wanting to pull Castiel's hands away from his face.

“We all know the love you have for the older Winchester,” Lucifer kind of snorts at that, one of the corners of his mouth curled upwards, and he's now grinning. “I'm nothing like him.”

“It's... not the same feeling.” The younger replies, and Lucifer squints at that. Castiel managed to free his wrists of Lucifer's hands, and he insists to maintain them close, placing them over the eldest's shoulders. Lucifer takes a deep breath, and his eyes are once again, fixed on Castiel's. The stare is so deep, it made Castiel's vessel shiver.

“... Excuse me?” Lucifer's way to demand an explanation, but Castiel ignores that for now, and his eyes scanned for injuries.

A hand lowers to the hem of Lucifer's shirt and it threatens to lift it over, but Lucifer is stubborn, and there is once again a hand over Castiel's wrist. Lucifer's movement caused the little one to move even closer to him, his lips almost touching Lucifer's, and the Devil is gazing at his eyes still, but then they flicked down to look at his mouth. They were so damn close.  
Castiel's lips trembles, he let out a shaky breath. He's so tempted to close the distance.  
They were right to say Lucifer was a consuming fire, he feels like the usual moth, dragged to the intensity of the light that is the Morning Star.  
So beautiful, so appealing, inviting, alluring... _Please make it stop_.

“I... need to...”

Lucifer says nothing, he waits for Castiel to finish his sentence.  
Castiel wants to hurt him just because of that behaviour, when Lucifer is always talking and talking. Damn him!

“I need to... see... how serious is the... damage.”

“It's fine...” The eldest whispers, he senses Castiel leaning closer, and he fixes his back against the wall, his hand releases Castiel's wrist, and Castiel is quiet for a moment. As if he just forgot about what he was doing before this.

Right, he wanted to give a look at his abdomen, search for more burn marks. He lifted the olive green shirt just a little, skin can be seen, pale skin under it, and then Castiel was sliding his palm over it, well, over a small part of it. And Lucifer gasps softly, the contrast of the warm skin against his coldness...

“Were you not going to give it a _look_...?” He teases, but Castiel doesn't reply.

“This makes the job done, as well.” The clever reply, still talking so close between whispers. No one wanted to lose this game, apparently.

Castiel is a fool if he believes for a moment he was going to win this one, being Lucifer who he is. He should never forget why he was once God's favorite.  _Never_.  
The Devil is prideful of himself, like always, he might be smiling like a smug bastard inside his mind, but in the outside, his gaze was so serious, so focused into luring the little Angel to draw him closer, that Castiel isn't even thinking about that possibility.

There is a cold puff of air between their vessels' breathing, Lucifer is always reminding the others of who he is, and how changed things are around him. Castiel's warm breath also reminds the Devil of the things he had lost, and he's tempted to let him win, for this time only, perhaps, as he feels the warm touch over his skin, Castiel inspecting his left side with his fingertips.  
But Castiel speaks again, and Lucifer's mind is back into place.

“Hmm... I guess I will have to give it a look anyway.” And just like that, he pulled himself back a bit, and gazed down. Pulling the shirt up a little, he can finally see his torso, and there are some burn marks as well, but it isn't so serious, for now. Lucifer almost rolled his eyes, but smiled a little at what Castiel did, then. He gently made him retreat his hands off him, and the shirt covered his skin once again.

That didn't mean Lucifer was alright mentally, and Castiel knows this.

“Is your curiosity appeased?”

“Some of it.”  
  
“Some of it?” He lifted a brow, a soft grin on his cold lips.

“ _Yes_.”

Both knew there was now a indescriptible sense of curiosity, and that had nothing to do with health.  
Castiel is curious about Lucifer in a deeper level, and Lucifer was just as much as the little one, about him.

Lucifer is _this_ close to tell him, by all means, _satisfy yourself completely_.

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

//////////////

_  
“Come on, Castiel, you can do it.” The soft voice of Lucifer said, as he watched the little fledgling trying to jump off a big tree._

“ _I am scared,” the little one said, and a laugh could be heard, only it wasn't Lucifer's._

“ _Don't be a coward, Cass.” Gabriel, the youngest from the Archangels was now taking place beside Lucifer, and Lucifer squinted his eyes at him. “It's just a jump!”_

“ _And we will be here to catch you if anything,” the eldest reassured._

“ _Last time Gabriel wasn't there...”_

“ _But I am now,” Lucifer replied to Castiel who was looking at Gabriel, and Gabriel was basically shrugging._

“ _I had stuff to do, and since he wasn't mooooving...” The Trickster tried to smile and change that look in his older brother's eyes, but Lucifer was kind of scolding him just with his gaze. Gabriel had to roll his eyes. “C'mon, Luci... You'll see, he won't jump.”_

_Lucifer just gazed up at Castiel, and tried to encourage the little fledgling to jump once again, with a soft voice, and a gentle smile. “I am not going anywhere, Castiel. I promise you that.”_

_Castiel gazed down at them, his little white wings shivering a little behind his back, and as he curled his brows upwards, he blinks, and after thinking about it, and after watching at Gabriel almost disappointed with how coward he was behaving, he thought he had to give it a try. So it wasn't only for Lucifer's supporting side that made him give a step forward, and let himself fall into the abyss, it was also because of Gabriel.  
_ _He didn't want to make two Archangels look at him with disappointment, or shame._

_The problem wasn't the flying part, Castiel was supposed to be able to fly without a problem by now, but the moment before abandoning the tree, one of the branches hurt one of his wings, and Castiel got nervous all of the sudden. Gabriel looked up at him, ready to jump in and help him, but Lucifer was already a step ahead, and when the youngest Archangel realized, Lucifer was already with little Cass on his arms. Lucifer descended and landed near Gabriel._

_Castiel was crying silently, trying to cover the little tears from his eyes, and Lucifer smiled softly._

“ _It's okay, Castiel, you were great,” Lucifer was looking down at him as Castiel was wrapping his arms around his neck, and then he glances at Gabriel. The Messenger was looking at Cass' right wing, it was hurt._

_Lucifer watches Gabriel reaching a hand to heal the wound with his own grace, and then a smile came out of his lips._

“ _You experienced an accident, bucko, it happens to all of us.” It was his time to calm the little one. “Next time it will be. I can't believe you actually jumped, all by yourself!”_

_Lucifer chuckles, caressing the little Angel's head. The little fledgling looked over his shoulder to find Gabriel, and then, shyly, smiled at his comment. Castiel was quick to show his little pride, closing his eyes, lifting his eyebrows, flapping his wings eagerly behind his back, thing that only made the other two laugh softly together._

_Just then Castiel gazed back at Lucifer, and smiled at him. Lucifer thought his smile could melt the coldest heart._

 

//////////////

 

 

And now, more than just having remembering about that old memory with Castiel, Lucifer was also thinking about Gabriel. It made his heart sink a little just reminding about the last time he saw him, and narrowing his eyes, looking down at the ground, he released a deep breath.  
He missed him so much. If only he could just go back, and do things differently... Maybe he could have prevented that attack, and spare them both from an unnecessary confrontation.  
But things weren't like that, and he had lost his little brother.

Lost in between thoughts, he didn't realize someone was now standing near him, and just like that, a couple of hands placed something at the top of his head.

Lucifer looks up, and there is Sam.

“Oh, look at how beautiful you are now,” he said teasingly, and sat down beside him. He had to play along the whole ' _most beautiful thing God ever created in all existence_ ' thing.

What the... Oh. A crown of flowers. Sam was happy today it seems, Lucifer still isn't used having Sam acting all friendly around him, but well, it has been months after he got out, and both Winchesters apparently calmed down, even Dean, and that's weird counting his experience with the older Winchester.

But Lucifer was calm, he hasn't shown signs of wanting to start anything, and the curious part? He hasn't even dared asking Sam to be his vessel, even with his own vessel falling apart slowly. Sam knew Lucifer's condition, and he also found weird that he wasn't trying anything, so of course he decided to give him a chance, and see things closely. Lucifer ended up being more interesting than Sam could have ever thought. They, indeed, had things in common, and that should frighten him... But it didn't.

The Devil took the crown with both hands, and squinted slightly, finding curious the choice of flowers. White roses.

“Cass thought you would like them,” Sam added later, fixing part of his hair as he rested his back against the same tree Lucifer was using to lay back.

“Then Castiel did this?”

“Let's say we both worked on it together,” Sam grinned, almost playfully, and Lucifer furrowed his brows amused.

“I see, that bored, huh...” Satan teased.

“Oh, yeah.” But Sam would follow this game.

Lucifer half smiled, and placed the crown over Sam's head, “I believe it suits you better.” And Sam was quick to let go a soft laugh, he didn't even bother to take the crown off his hair. “So... Where is Castiel?”

“Hmm... He went to look out for something, I think,” Sam took off the crown off his hair now, and placed it down against the grass.

“Is not your brother growling at the fact you are here and now with me?” He finds it funny, teasing Sam with the idea he felt comfortable around him now, apparently.

“He'll always complain I guess, but he hasn't said anything in the last couple of weeks, I think he's getting used to you as well.”

Then he was right, the Devil thought.

“Besides, there is Cass. He's always saying good things about you around us.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah,” Sam chuckles, “he really has some weird admiration for you.”

Lucifer grins, “Why _weird_?”

“Because _you_ are weird,” the boy says, obviously fooling around, with a playful smile adorning his lips. “I guess we all are,” he added later, and Lucifer has to smile. “Hey, I... I wanted to ask you something...”

“Yes?” Lucifer pays attention to Sam, he even looks at him directly in the eyes, waiting for whatever the Winchester wanted to ask.

“... Why haven't you tried asking me to be your vessel?”

The Devil is silent now, he takes his time to reply back... No, he basically chose not to say anything back this time, and ran a hand through his blond hair.

“Your vessel, I can see it's falling apart. Cass already told me you worked on something in order to try to make it stronger, but it doesn't seem to be working nicely.”

“I tried to use some magic on it, it basically works like demon blood. But yes, it won't last.”

“Then why?”

The Devil was looking at Sam again, his icy blue eyes set on his, and he had to slightly squint at his other half. “You know why.”

For a moment there was just silence. Sam knew why Lucifer didn't even tried, because both knew Sam would never say _Yes_ to the Devil, not really.

The Winchester didn't say anything for a couple of minutes, and when Lucifer looked away, and he opened his mouth to say something, anything, someone else approached them.

“Sam, Dean is looking for you,” Castiel said, and Sam stood up.

“Alright, I'll leave you two alone.”

Lucifer just sees Sam leaving, back inside to the bunker, and Castiel is now taking Sam's place. Only that he doesn't sit down just yet.

“Did I interrupt something, brother?”

“Not really,” the eldest said, and looked up at him. “Come here,” he invited him to sit down beside him, and so Castiel did.

“I see Sam brought you the crown of flowers,” the younger Angel said with a little smile.

“Yes, he told me you both worked on it.” The Devil relaxes his brows to look at his little brother, Castiel was taking the crown with his hands, and Lucifer approached him to take it from his hands, and placing it over the seraph's head. “Nice choice by the way, how did you know I liked roses?”

“I didn't, I... just thought they were pretty.” Castiel smiles, touching with his index finger one of the petals.

Lucifer bites his lower lip, trying not to smile too wide. “They are,” he agreed. “Where were you before?”

“Just helping Dean with something, he is, uhm... Trying a new recipe.”

“A new recipe?”

“Yes.”  
  
Lucifer wanted to laugh.

Castiel doesn't understand the motive of why his older brother was smiling and trying not to laugh, so tilting his head slightly to his right, the Seraph squints.

“Well, I suppose he really is not even thinking on what Sam is doing or not...”

“He was mostly concerned watching a guy cooking in Sam's laptop.” Castiel added, and Lucifer nodded amused. Of course, he had to watch the procedure.

Both smiled every now and then, talking about such small things like stuff the Winchester brothers were doing, which were Sam or Dean's ideas regarding something, and Castiel was the one who shared the most. Lucifer likes to stay quiet, and listen to him.

The way his icy blue eyes looked at him though, seemed as if the Devil wasn't listening at all, as if he couldn't focus. And how to do that, when he feels completely mesmerized by the sight before him? And it wasn't just that, but he can even hear Castiel's true voice through the deepest of his vessel's, that grace, and even his own, particular light coming out of the beautiful blue that belonged to Jimmy's eyes...

And Lucifer just wished this was the real deal.

More now than ever, because he believes he's falling into temptation, and he doesn't want to feel the same pain all over again.

Cold,  
And then the feeling that something wasn't right with him...

“Lucifer?”

The Morning Star had his eyes narrowed, looking deeply into Castiel's eyes when he called his name, it seems the little Seraph was aware that the Devil was lost in his thoughts. “Yes?”

“Were you listening?”

“No.”

Castiel was expecting another kind of answer, but Lucifer and his honesty...

“I apologize, Castiel.” Lucifer smiled, reaching a hand to cup his chin, his cold fingers brushing tenderly the skin. He can see Castiel's cheeks adopting a new reddish color as he blinks. “Tell me again,” he encouraged for the little one to repeat as he lowers his hand, but Cass denies closing his eyes, smiling a little.

“It doesn't matter, not anymore.” When he opened his eyes to look at Lucifer again, he notices the Morning Star gazing somewhere else, and his wings were barely visible. He understands just by the way Lucifer tried to move them, that he was aiming for the light.

Still, he tries to feel the sun over his feathers, and Castiel felt his borrowed heart, sink.

He wanted to do something for him, he wanted to make him feel he wasn't alone now, and that the nightmare is over... But he isn't sure how to express it.  
Castiel reached a hand to Lucifer's back, and tried to touch one of his feathers, gently.  
Lucifer gasped at the sensation, almost as if it had hurt, and Castiel almost pulled the hand away completely, only that he didn't.

“Does it hurt, brother?”

“... I'm not sure,” the eldest said in a whisper. Lucifer isn't sure if it was just the impression of feeling someone else touching his wings and feathers. It has been so long after all...

“May I...?” The Seraph asks gently, letting the Morning Star know he wanted to caress them, make him feel good as when he himself was little, and another Angel helped him with the grooming. This wouldn't be entirely grooming, but mostly a tender caressing, something to make Lucifer feel good.

And Lucifer didn't answer with a word at least, but he softly nodded once, allowing Castiel to try touching his feathers if that's what he wanted, and so Castiel smiles, and goes for it.

His warm fingers are a welcoming sensation, Lucifer realizes, even when he can barely feel it. His wings are so numb because of the cold he used to bear in the cage, that he can barely feel anything. Castiel's touch was gentle, it made the Devil relax after a while, like when someone plays with someone else's hair, and that makes you feel sleepy depending how much you enjoy the attention. Lucifer doesn't feel sleepy, but he just can't help allow himself to enjoy all of it with eyes closed.

He doesn't know how Castiel is looking at him, if he's smiling, or not. He doesn't know if he's doing this because he is concerned about him, or is just trying to show some affection.

Was Castiel maybe... trying to get closer?

Almost in an involuntary move, Lucifer is like encouraging the caressing, his back pushed softly against Castiel's fingers, and the younger Angel had to stop for a second.  
Lucifer still wasn't watching, so he can only guess Castiel's thoughts. When he stopped, but a second later, he was sliding his fingers even deeper between feathers, Lucifer had to lower his face to support his forehead against his forearms. He doesn't say anything, but he can tell Castiel already knows he's shivering, something so subtle, and precious.

Analyzing the way the Seraph moved his fingers almost experimentally, Lucifer guesses Castiel has been lured to test more and more things. Lucifer let's him, he even spread his wings a little bit, and he can sense, he can hear the little one shifting, changing his spot. Lucifer feels part of Cass' knees against his lower back, and then instead of the fingers of one hand, now he feels two hands.

And poor Morning Star, he had to throw his head back as he released a pleasant, and almost inaudible, groan. His wings demands for more attention, but Castiel is taking his time. The Devil can sense Castiel's face is next to his, from behind it almost made the eldest feel weak, he was in disadvantage in this position, and he wants to object at the idea.

Castiel was slowly getting to him.  
Castiel was slowly making the fallen Archangel to lose his mind.

Lucifer opens his eyes, and blinks, once, twice. He wants to shake off this feeling. He wants to feel as if he is in control because if he isn't, thing could go down even worse, and so he looks over his shoulder, only to find Castiel's face even closer.

Again, that temptation.

Castiel even dares to smile at the beginning, but that was before. As soon he notices the look in the Morning Star's features is serious, calm, and almost as if expecting something else, the smile vanished from his lips.  
There is some anxiety in Castiel, Lucifer can feel it, more when he appreciates Castiel wanting to lean closer. The younger just stared down at his lips. He didn't imagine that, Lucifer thought.

…

All he can feel now is the curious breathing of Castiel against the back of his vessel's ear, against his neck.

_Oh, please..._

He shivers in anticipation.

_ComeCloserPleaseOhPlease..._

Both were shivering, actually. It's barely perceptible.

…

 

But nothing happens.

 

In an attempt of getting away, Lucifer stood up all of the sudden, and Castiel is left behind.  
Just for a second, though.

The Devil is now facing him, and since now both were on their feet, Lucifer kind of pinned Castiel against the tree.

“What were you doing?” The Archangel asks, narrowing his eyes. Not in a way to sound threatening, but with curiosity. Confused.

“I...” Castiel looks up at him, watching Lucifer lean his face closer to his as he looked with detail his vessel's features. “I'm sorry,” he tries to apologize, and that's because maybe, and just maybe, he was a little disrespectful with the Morning Star, and what he believes he feels next, is shame. Probably causing his vessel's cheeks to go a little red.

And what was Lucifer doing anyway? What was he doing? Why was he teasing the Seraph like this?

For moments Castiel thinks he wants to close the distance, and kiss him, but Lucifer pushes and teases the awkward sexual tension that floats between them, and he pushes into it some more.

Were they playing the same game again?

Lucifer sometimes wished that being inside human bodies could be easier. All this overwhelming emotions and sensations sometimes felt like too much. It was different from inside a vessel, hard to explain.  
As if it was harder to resist certain kind of things.

In this case, all he can think about is that he craves to feel Castiel's lips on his as he kissed the hell out of him. Something that can only be experienced in a body, not as Angels.

And God knows how _curious_ Lucifer can be...  
Especially with the _touching_.

There he was again, reaching a hand to Castiel's face, he can feel the texture of that skin against his cold fingertips, and he enjoys the peculiar tickle that comes when he ran softly his index finger against Castiel's stubble. And he breathes in when his thumb brushes softly the little Angel's lower lip.

Castiel stopped breathing, but it's ok. Angels don't need to breathe.

And Lucifer isn't sure how much time has passed since he inhaled oxigen into his borrowed lungs.

 _An inch closer... an inch closer._ He thinks to himself.

What's wrong about wanting to have this one thing, for once in his existence?  
He has never asked for anything before...  
He can be selfish, too.

Castiel was burning, and a soft whine came out of his lips.  
He wanted to cry.  
He wanted to let all go.  
The frustration was unbearable, and Lucifer doesn't seem to care.  
Why doesn't he seem to care?

“ _Please_...” Lucifer heard him say, the tone was so soft and weak, even he had troubles to hear it.

Just give him what he's asking...  
Just give yourself what you are craving deep inside.

If just only

If _just_ -

“Cass!” The voice of Sam interrupted the couple of Angels, and now Lucifer was stepping back, carefully lowering his hand.

And Castiel? Castiel was quick to blink and come back to reality.

“Yes, Sam?”

And move away from Lucifer...  
And walk toward Sam's direction.

“It's Dean. He's looking for you.” Sam commented, and when Castiel turned his face around to look back at Lucifer, he was gone. “Where's Lucifer?” The Winchester is sure he was there just a second ago.

The Seraph narrowed his eyes.

He didn't say anything back.

 

 

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

That day was particularly quiet, he knew something was going to happen, but he couldn't figure out what yet. Watching over the things Castiel, or even Sam, were doing, didn't help his mind to focus on anything else.

Castiel has been helping the Winchesters every now and then, something so usual, repetitive... But his little brother showed himself apparently happy, somehow, just knowing he was doing something good. At least he can help others as he was walking the Earth, and since he still was Sam and Dean's protector, it all came in handy.

Lucifer couldn't help but smile when he found out particular things like Castiel trying to learn human behaviour, still, even after the few years he has been walking amongst them, he still had a lot to learn about them. And then the comment of him being a hunter in training, since little Thursday would make mistakes sometimes, and Dean was there to tell him the things he screw up. The times Sam and Dean had to split to save time, Castiel usually was there, by the older Winchesters' side.

Castiel and his profound bond with Dean... Sure.

Of course that sometimes he would be a part of an investigation while Castiel helped Dean, Lucifer thought it would be funny to play along, and show up before Sam to give him a hand. The first times he did this, the Winchester would show himself insecure about the idea, but then he realized Lucifer was of great help, and it wasn't such a big surprise to be aware that the Devil was everything but naive. Unlike Cass, Lucifer knew how to deal with people, and speaking the right amount of words, he could do a better job than Sam when it came to finding leads.

They could make a good team, thinking about it. And sure, Sam sometimes would just tell the Devil why the Hell he didn't just guide him to the responsibles or whatever, so they could finish the cases a lot faster, but... where would be the fun in that?

Lucifer enjoyed seeing little Sam doing his work, of course. Sam was good I mean, really good on his own. The Devil was just there to give him someone to talk to, make him realize something he probably didn't see in a specific moment, making things easier, but that was all.

 

Sam was studying another case, Castiel was somewhere else, and Dean was out for some grocery shopping. Then all of the sudden Lucifer can see Sam picking up his phone. The Devil couldn't hear who was the one calling the Winchester, but he guesses it was probably Dean. If he were a little closer to the bunker, he would be able to hear, but he was at a considerable distance, and he wasn't looking to spy on them like a psycho, just... Watch over them.

It wasn't just because of the strange connection he had with Sam, but he knew Castiel tends to show himself around them more often. Sometimes Lucifer wonders if that was a good, or a bad sign? I mean, it could mean Castiel trusted a bit more in the Devil? Or maybe it meant that Castiel just prefered to be around the Winchesters than around one of his brothers?

And Lucifer can be jealous, and maybe he didn't realize yet that he has been stalking the Winchesters out of jealousy.

Perhaps he wanted to find out what was that Castiel found so interesting in them? What was that the boys had, that he didn't? Especially about Dean, since Castiel's attention is focused more on him.

And sure, we all know that Lucifer isn't looking at Sam because he already saw the boy as one of the most interesting things out there, more when the kid was supposed to be his other half. And Dean, well, he as well realized the Winchester proved to be even better than his older brother, Michael, that was enough for Lucifer to show the eldest Winchester some respect. Lucifer liked Dean as well, the human proved himself years ago after all. But Castiel... Castiel seemed to look beyond what the Devil could, and that intrigues him.

What made Dean Winchester so interesting to his little brother's eyes?

Sam was leaving the bunker now, and minutes later Lucifer could see the Impala approaching, and stopping near the entrance so Sam could climb in.

The boys left, and Lucifer stood there, watching them leave.

And he thought for a moment to go after them, see what was all the fuss about, but the distinct sound of wings flapping made him stay in his spot. Someone landed a few feet behind him, and Lucifer knew it was Michael.

He looked at the eldest from over his shoulder, and showed his usual soft grin. Michael just narrowed his eyes at the sight of it.

Lucifer knew this day was going to be special, but never thought Michael would be involved in it. At the sight of him getting closer, but not saying anything yet, concerned Lucifer at some point. He hasn't seen his older brother since that night the eldest told him that maybe it was a mistake showing himself around him when most of the things they do, is fight. A bad exchange of words, and the weather around them would heat up. They wouldn't get to the point to jump over each other to tear each other's throats, but just talking was enough to kill the mood.

“Is something wrong?” Lucifer asks, casually, crossing his arms above his chest.

“We need to talk.” The eldest replied, standing in front of the Morning Star. Lucifer had to squint his eyes, curiously.

“By all means, big brother, speak.”

Michael takes a deep breath, trying to relax the tension in his vessel's shoulders. “Our brothers know about you, and they have been asking me to... do something about it.”

Lucifer almost rolled his icy blue eyes, and tried not to laugh, and as he ran the tip of his vessel's tongue over his lower lip, he released a soft, amused snort. Michael wasn't talking now, waiting for Lucifer to say something, because he knew Lucifer would say something, he knew him that well, and the usual sarcasm that tends to slip out of that tongue of his. But the Devil's eyes laid on Michael's, and the sarcastic comment he was hoping to hear, never came. “So what? They want you to fight me, right?” Instead, he sees Lucifer looking at him with a more serious, curious expression. “What did you tell them?”

The Sword of Heaven looked at his little brother, and at how Lucifer was again, narrowing his eyes. At how calmly he behaved, and the usual gesture with his hands, staring at the blond's index fingertip poking softly at his own chin. “I tried to convince them that the idea of a fight was not necessary, because you have not shown any indication of wanting to start anything against mankind.”

“Oh,” Lucifer grins at him, in the usual seductive way he always had for his older brother. It always resembled like a tease, a game. “Does that mean you are willing to give me a chance, Michael?” And he sees the eldest narrow his brows slightly.

“Things are not looking good in Heaven, Lucifer,” he says. “Our brothers believe it is better not to let you walk freely. They do not believe it is right, nor the best choice, for me taking it slightly.”

“And you are afraid they dare to rebel?” Lucifer chuckles. “I thought they all obeyed your orders without asking why.”

“Things changed since they found out Father is not in Heaven anymore.” The eldest tried to stand in his spot better. “And having me thinking that I don't want to fight, makes them doubt my leadership.”

“And you miss being the little, righteous soldier, and bring me down because that was the task Father asked you eons ago?”

“I did not-”

“Be honest with yourself, brother-” Lucifer interrupted Michael, but Michael was having none of it.

“I am not giving you over, Lucifer!”

And of course, that shocked Lucifer a little. More when Michael kind of yelled that at him, trying to make himself heard.

So Lucifer stays silent for a while, just looking at him.

“I am not going to. Starting the Apocalypse all over again cannot be good, we still do not know why Father freed us.” Michael walks around, roaming the place with his eyes, glaring at the bunker from afar. Lucifer has to turn around, and stares at his brother's back. Lucifer waits patiently for Michael to turn around again, so their eyes can lock again. “Last time things went down in a way it was not predestined, that has to mean something... and maybe...”

“Maybe...?” Lucifer's eyes can't look away now. He appreciates when his brother turned around again to look at him, and the look in those eyes could tell so many things.

“Maybe I should have listened to you.”

Lucifer is silent, his posture remains the same, still with his right index finger close to his face, near his lips, and chin. And somehow, he felt something warm within his chest for a change.

“Perhaps I should have walked off the chessboard like you suggested, maybe that was what Father wanted me to do. Not to fight, if you were willing not to do so years ago...”

Michael was looking at Lucifer, he stays silent for a moment, and the younger Archangel isn't sure how to reply to that. Having Michael talking like this, was something he wasn't used to. He finds himself speechless, and for once, he isn't sure of what to do, how to react.

Then the eldest began to step closer, and Lucifer had to lower his hand, he squinted his eyes, now having his arms on his sides, just standing still as Michael stood before him. And he blinks, the iris from his vessel trembles slightly, they try to stare at Michael's eyes, both of them, but being this close he isn't sure to which one he should be paying more attention, so he feels weak.

When the Sword of Heaven reached his hands up to cup his little brother's cheeks, Lucifer closed his eyes by instinct. He wasn't breathing. He didn't know, really, how to react.

Lucifer probably thought to step back, this intimate gesture was so long forgotten, he's even afraid.

This couldn't be real.

This _couldn't_ be _real_...

“We are going to make things right this time, little brother,” Michael said, softly and gently. And Lucifer felt forced to open his eyes again. The Devil looked at his brother straight in the eyes, there wasn't anger behind the icy blues, but maybe confusion, and doubt.

Lucifer isn't sure why he hasn't dared to walk away from him. He should, right? Then... _why_?

He won't show himself weak. He had to let him know that he didn't _need_ him, but that would be such a big lie. Lucifer knows he craved for the company of his brothers, and Michael has been always the one he used to look up to. Fighting with him always felt so wrong, but what was there to do? Both felt betrayed with one another, Lucifer by Michael, and Michael by Lucifer.

A strange feeling ran through his vessel, and it almost resembled a shiver.

Lucifer obviously didn't say anything back, he let Michael say that, and then watched him lowering his hands, and walking away.

He didn't dare to follow Michael with his eyes after that, he just let him go. Lucifer believes Michael said he was going to come back with news as soon as he could, and then the sound of wings.

Just then Lucifer allowed himself to look back, at the sky.

Michael was gone, and he was left alone in that place.

 

A while later, Lucifer was on his own, just appreciating nature when a voice called out to him. The peculiar thing about this, was that it was in his mind.

_'Lucifer, it's me, Sam.'_

Sam was praying to him.

Well, that sure was something new.

 _'Look... Maybe you should come to see this, Castiel is also here. We found something, someone...'_ Sam tried to sound calm, but he wasn't sure what to expect from this, and leaving Lucifer to the expectation wasn't something he wanted to do, so he just told him the place they were dealing with all that, and Lucifer decided not to make them wait.

Of course that when he arrived, he showed up a few feet behind the younger Winchester. Sam, obviously, startled.

“Lucifer...” He began to say, ready to show him the usual bitchface. “We really need to talk about this.” Just like Castiel at the very beginning, having an Angel showing just like that wasn't something, not even the Winchesters, are used to. If Lucifer had shown a few meters away... but he chose to be _this_ close. Of course Sam was going to startle.

“What's wrong?” That was Lucifer, calm and polite like always.

“Castiel and Dean are with him now, Dean didn't want you to know, not yet at least, but I thought-”

“ _Him_?” Lucifer narrowed his eyes, Sam should just say it.

Sam took a deep breath, and decided to guide Lucifer to follow him inside the motel room. Lucifer followed.

When Sam stepped inside, he could see Dean's back, when he soon turned around to see that his brother wasn't alone and noticed Lucifer there as well. And then there was Castiel, he was quick to find out his older brother was there, apparently he knew since the moment Lucifer landed in this place, and that's why he wasn't surprised to see him in the room, with Sam.

Sam moved to one side, giving Lucifer space to see the one who was laying on the motel bed, and Dean frowned slightly, but Lucifer wasn't paying attention to him, he was now... almost speechless to see that the one in the bed, was someone he wasn't expecting to see. Not after what had happened between them.

“... Gabriel?”

Castiel approached Lucifer, and stood by his side. Dean was looking at Sam as if asking his brother why the hell he had to call Satan to come here, when they knew the story behind them, when they knew they had a fight, and that ended with Gabriel's death years ago.

Sam had to reach a hand to his older brother's shoulder, and invited him to step outside, at least for now, and leave the Angels alone. Castiel was there, he said to Dean in a whisper, once outside, but Dean didn't seem to be happy with this.

Thing is, Sam thought it was a good opportunity for them to get along again or whatever, and besides, they didn't know what was wrong with Gabriel, or why he was here, and now. They recognized the Archangel by the vessel, and Castiel confirmed the boys it was Gabriel for real, when they asked him.

That was basically what Castiel was telling Lucifer now, how they found him.

“Dean found him in a cabin, in the woods, he... was searching for some vampires when he ran into Gabriel.” Castiel explained, watching the way Lucifer was still staring at the vessel, his little brother, laying on the bed. Castiel could tell Lucifer was aware that the Angel within the vessel, was indeed Gabriel. “Just then he called me, and I told him it was indeed our brother.”

Lucifer finally dares to step closer, walking around the bed only to stop to his side. The Devil takes a deep breath, he narrows his eyes... “How is it possible? I was not aware of his presence, till now...” That is. It only brought more and more questions to the eldest, of course. And Lucifer isn't sure how to feel, he's glad to see Gabriel is here, and alright.

“You think he is fine?” Castiel asked, and Lucifer reached a hand to touch Gabriel's forehead.

He's alright, that much Lucifer can tell. But still, he took a moment to analyze him, and make sure he was. Closing his eyes, a bright light shone out of his palm for a moment, and then he was opening his eyes again. Lucifer's fingers tried to fix a lock of the Trickster's hair... “He is fine, Gabriel will wake up soon.”

Castiel relaxed, and a little smile appeared on his lips. Then he sees Lucifer standing up, trying to get away from there, but Castiel reaches out for him, managing to hold Lucifer's left wrist. “Where are you going, Lucifer?”

“...” He looked down at him, then away, and sighed. “I am not sure if I should be here when he wakes up, little brother.”

The Seraph can tell Lucifer is afraid. “Why not?” Squinting and furrowing his brows slightly, Castiel steps closer to stand in front of him. “You should.”

And Lucifer smiled at him, sadly. “No, little Thursday... I should not.”

“I do not agree,” Castiel said, “I can see you are worried for him, that you want to stay, so stay.”

“Gabriel and I-” He tried to explain, but Castiel apparently already knew, and that's why he was quick to interrupt him.

“I know what you want to say, I know about that fight.” He said at first, and Lucifer opened his eyes a little. Castiel reached his hands to Lucifer's face, something that made the eldest flinch a little, as if that got him unprepared, but then he relaxed under the younger's touch. “Stay,” he insists, and Lucifer narrowed his eyes at him. Castiel can see Lucifer is in pain, in his heart, in his grace. “I can stay with you if you want me to, so you won't be alone when he wakes up.”

Lucifer takes a deep breath. He can't find the words to express himself right now.

“The past, is in the past, brother... You should fight for what you want, right?”

And for some reason, Castiel's words reminds him of his own ideology. Yes, he wanted to fight for Gabriel, he wanted to fix things, but...

“I know you want to fight for him, so I am going to fight for what I want, and what I want right now... is for you to stay.”

Lucifer sighed, and just then he allowed himself to smile a little. “... Okay. You win.”

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

 

But Castiel wasn't there when Gabriel finally woke up.

Lucifer wouldn't admit it, but he was uneasy being inside that motel room, just the two of them. Gabriel laying on his side on the bed, and the Devil standing beside the window, trying not to look at his little brother the whole time.

He wondered how much more it would take Castiel to come back? He said he was going to talk to Sam and Dean about the situation, to let them know that Gabriel was going to wake up soon. That kind of conversation usually takes you just a few minutes, right? Then why is that, even after fifteen minutes have passed, he still hasn't returned?

Lucifer closed his eyes, releasing a soft breath. He was in his usual pose, arms crossed over his chest, the window beside him nearly to freeze up...

A sound made him slightly open his eyes, the bed in which Gabriel was sleeping, making a notorious sound as if the body above it, decided to turn and experiment a new position, and Lucifer doesn't dare to look back and over his shoulder to confirm his suspicion.

At least not until he was certain that Gabriel was indeed, awake. And that came out with the simple gesture of the youngest, making the notorious sound of a sigh.

“Should I ask what's going on around here?” And obviously, after having the Trickster speaking his mind out loud, of course. “Luci?”

The way Gabriel used to call Lucifer, had the Devil tensing up a little. The way he said it this time, it almost sounded like the youngest was trying to be sarcastic. Lucifer knows it wasn't appropriate to call him that way, not with how things unfolded the last time they faced each other. Unless Gabriel had forgotten? But no, he really doubts this.

Lucifer finally turned around to look at him, watching Gabriel with arms crossed over his chest as well, just like his legs, adopting this... casual posture over the bed, made him realize he was aware of everything, and that the younger obviously remembers. He still remembers.

“You shouldn't be the one asking that question, little brother.” Lucifer then replied, his icy blue eyes soon shifting from the honey like color Gabe's eyes had, to the window again.

“Riiight,” because he was unconscious and all that jazz. Gabriel turned his face to the opposite side, and narrowed his eyes. He didn't like the situation, that much was obvious, it feels weird having to face his older brother now. There is resentment, but also feelings all around. And the tension in the air, it was thick.

Lucifer is expecting Gabriel to say something, because that's just who he was. He talks when he is nervous, at least from what he can remember, and then his personality that just speaks by itself. Lucifer can also picture him trying to leave, anything that can help him to get away from him, and their current situation...

“Who found me?”

“How come you are back, and I could not feel your presence nearby?” Lucifer thought his question needed to be answered first.

“I asked first,” Gabriel was standing from the bed, and Lucifer was furrowing his eyes at him, squinting a little. That was the clue for Gabriel to watch out his tone with him. At least, that's what the Trickster thought. “I-”

“Castiel.” Lucifer replied first then. He didn't want to fight, not even for the slightest of things.

Gabriel blinked, and decided to calm down the tension on his face. Fair enough then, he should reply to the older's question now. “Seems to me you're underestimating me, bro...” But he had to tease him a little bit first.

“Gabriel...” The warning in his tone.

“Ok, fine. Geez,” rolling his eyes, he even exclaimed with his hands. “I've no idea. I just woke up a couple of weeks ago, in middle of the forest.” He tries to explain, “I was dead...” The comment made both feel uneasy, of course. “And then I wasn't.”

The Morning Star remains silent for a short while, just staring at his little brother, not daring to approach him. “Do you think it was... Father, the one who brought you back?”

“I dunno, maybe?” He shrugs. “How is that you're walking free, by the way?” Gabriel furrowed his brows in question. “After all, the information I could get in the last days, said you were back in the cage with big ol' Mike.”

“We were... I'm still trying to figure out what is going on.” Lucifer replied, and then decided to go back into his questions. “Did someone attack you? Why were you unconscious?” Since Gabriel said he has been walking the Earth for a couple of weeks now, right?

“I... I'm not at my full strenght, apparently” that's the only explanation he had at the moment. “I blackout sometimes, it happened more often in the first week. It's weird even for me.”

And Lucifer isn't sure what to think of that. He could try to get closer, and ask Gabriel to let him examine him better then, but that thing... He doubts of him letting him do anything. They weren't _close_ like once before anymore, right?

That sure saddened the Morning Star, but he had to hide it.

So he stays quiet for a while... Until Gabriel couldn't stand the silence, again.

“Why are you here?” Gabriel doesn't understand. He thought Lucifer was mad at him after he dared to face him years ago, stepping in front for mankind and those pagan gods.

“Castiel wanted me to stay.” He said, sincerely.

“Oh, so that means you want to get the hell outta here, right, Luci?”

Lucifer looked at him again, squinting his eyes. It seems his little brother didn't like the answer, maybe he was expecting to hear something else...?

“Were you expecting something else as a reply, Gabriel?” Lucifer tilts his head a little to his right. “Or are you going to deny you do not feel uncomfortable by having me near?” He frowned a bit.

“Ohh, so now it falls on me, huh? What about you?”

“I did not want to bother you, that's all. For all I know, you probably want me as far away from you as possible.” Lucifer takes a deep breath, and exhales. “I am glad to see you again, and alive, if I have to tell you how I feel about this.”

“How can you say that after stabbing me with my own blade?!”

“With your _own_ blade.” He pointed at his own words, and tried not to let this discussion affect him, but it looks impossible. “You tried to kill me, Gabriel, what was I supposed to do?”

“I wasn't planning to kill you!”

“No?” Lucifer releases a breath of a laugh, “Are you making fun of me?”

Gabriel frowns. Blinks. Clenched his fists.

“I did not want to fight you. Never.” Lucifer's voice sounds even a little broken. “And you chose them over me...” His voice is so soft it almost resembles a whisper. “You even chose these abominations who call themselves gods, over me.”

And how to answer he had feelings for Kali, and that he considered these _gods_ , like _family_ as well? “I couldn't let you take over Sam, I had to try to stop the Apocalypse you and Michael were trying to rise.”

“What did you think I was going to do to Sam?” Lucifer lifted his brows, gesturing to join his words. “I did not even know he was there. And even if I did, he knew I was waiting for him. If I wanted to hold them in place, I would have done it, but I am not like Michael. I never forced him to say Yes to me.”

And the Trickster remains silent for now, his breathing, his chest, going in and out as if he couldn't control the emotions being in a vessel. So many things he would like to say, Lucifer didn't tell him this when they fought, then why now?

Ok. Let's say he was mad, it's an option.

“You could have left after that, but you insisted to fight me...”

“And you killed me.” He still can't forget the look Lucifer gave him right before ending his existence, he just can't. Gabriel did what he thought best, but he still loved his brother. Of course that situation hurt him, he had to go against the one who basically taught him all he knew.

“My mistake, if there is one, was allowing the anger to take over me, and finish you off that night.” The eldest said after a moment of just looking at his brother, blinking, furrowing his brows almost sadly.

Anger was a big issue, indeed. Maybe still is... Maybe not.

Gabriel's eyes never left Lucifer's. He wanted to say something else, but now he couldn't somehow. The expectation to know if Lucifer would continue speaking, was too much.

“Maybe I could have saved you...” Even when the wound would probably end up killing Gabriel after that stab, and Lucifer as well thought for a moment to put him out of his misery, but... that's why Lucifer feels guilty anyway, he felt broken by so many different reasons, and that was one of them. Maybe, and just maybe, he could have _saved_ him. End up trapping him or something, so Gabriel wouldn't put himself in the middle of his fight with Michael.

But things unfolded differently, and that's what bothers him.

Both remained silent after that, Gabriel not being sure of what to reply to Lucifer, and Lucifer not being sure of what to do next. His vessel is still falling apart, and he feels tired, he was tired for so many things at this point...

He wished Gabriel could just talk, say anything, a hint about him wanting to fix things, just say; _It's in the past, bro._

Lucifer was about to say he was sorry, even when he as well was angry at Gabriel for what he tried to do, “I just...” He released a soft breath, “I'm just tired.”

And damn his pride, he should just do the same he did with Michael years ago in that field, put the pride away, and beg him to stop. Beg him to be _brothers_ again.

His lips parted open, as if wanting to say something, but then he closed them. Gabriel was always watching him, apparently feeling the same way, there is some doubt in the Trickster's eyes, that much Lucifer could tell, but he isn't sure. When the Devil parted his lips again to say something, someone entered the room.

It was Castiel. Finally.

And at the same time, Lucifer thought that he could have waited a minute more to step inside the room.

Sadly, now the moment was gone.

“Gabriel.” Castiel said, opening his eyes some more when he saw his brother awake, just as Lucifer said. “You are awake... Are you feeling well?”

“I'm fine, bucko.” And the Trickster was stepping away from the bed, as if he wanted to go outside.

Lucifer knows he is trying to run, _again_.

He didn't let that happen though, he was soon walking outside on his own first, and Castiel looked at him.

“Lucifer...” He tried to call him, and Lucifer glanced at him, then at Gabriel in a glimpse.

“I'm tired, Castiel. I might return later,” the eldest said, looking at Cass. “... If anyone needs me.” That is.

And just like that, knowing that Castiel had to stay anyway, because he was there to support the Winchesters and now Gabriel, he knew the best to do was just leave. And let's not even mention that Gabriel was surely going to be interrogated not only by the Winchesters, but probably Castiel as well.

The Angel of Thursday preferred him to stay, but he wasn't going to force Lucifer this time, so that's why he remained in silence and just watched him leave. The moment Lucifer stepped outside the cabin, Sam looked at him. Lucifer nodded once as a way to let him know he was leaving, and then disappeared.

Sam narrowed his eyes at that, and then spotted Gabriel by the door frame, next to Castiel.

 

* * *

 

It's cold.

So cold he believes he can't take it.

Maybe this was a new form to experience Nick's deterioration, he thought.

Lying on his side, giving his back to the room he has been using as a hideout for a while, and even the world, the Devil tries to rest with his eyes closed. His arms are around him, hugging himself. His wings are trying to cover him from what's around him as well, mostly his instinct kicking in, an old habit he had. It used to work eons ago, they were warm, he still can remember how his wings used to warm him and protect him... But not anymore.

His wings were just as cold as the aura around him, and sometimes, that as well makes him feel like crying. _Father_ has taken so much from him, and the cage sure did a good job to destroy part of himself.

He isn't sure how much time had passed since he saw Gabriel and the others, but it has been a while.

Lucifer takes a deep breath, his borrowed vessel is shaking, and he is forced to open his icy blue eyes slightly. He can see the old couch, of course.

So many thoughts on his mind right now, but if there was one that occupied more of his time, that was the memory of Gabriel in that cabin.

The Morning Star can't help but feel sad, and alone.

And then he was thinking of Castiel.

He wonders if Castiel would guess when he needed him the most...?

Maybe not. Why would he?

No...

He was used to be alone by now. And strong connections, those didn't exist anymore.

The last time he felt really connected with someone, that was his brothers. Michael and Gabriel especially.

But that died the day he rebelled, and Michael kicked him out.  


Another deep breath, and he was closing his eyes again.

Castiel is not coming.

Why was he thinking about the possibility he could?

Hope was the last thing one should lose...

Lucifer chuckles to himself.

He had fallen for the little one, isn't it? How could he crave for his company in moments like this? When he wished doubts could have an answer?  


_Get used to how things are now.  
_ _Remember this is all a lie.  
_ _Why would anyone want to love you again? Respect you again?  
_ _Put yourself back together, Morning Star._  


He feels his eyes watering, and one of his hands covers his borrowed face.  


_I'm trying._

… _I'm trying._

 

“I knew you were not alright, brother...”

Lucifer must be about to fall asleep again or something, he knew it was going to happen because time to time, his vessel required it dealing its condition. And he also knew that sometimes he can get delusional, right before it happens. Sometimes he hears voices...

Or maybe it were just his own.

He decided to pay the voice some attention, and looking over his shoulder, still lying on the couch, he sees Castiel standing in there. He was just... In the middle of the room.

Now he was getting closer, and Lucifer had to squint his eyes.

“... Castiel?” Castiel was close enough to make the Devil look even up at him. Lucifer isn't sure what's going on, or why was the angel of Thursday, here. Maybe something happened. Maybe he needed his help? “Are you really here?”

“I am.” Castiel almost tilted his head to one side at the sound of that question. Why was Lucifer asking that? “I was worried about you,” he added later, and tried to sit down closer to Lucifer.

Lucifer obliged by lifting his upper body, allowing him. But when he was about to sit up better, Castiel was placing an arm around him, as gesturing Lucifer could use his legs to continue his rest.

“... You are... getting worse, aren't you?” The younger asked, watching Lucifer laying back and on his side, his face is hidden between Castiel's trench coat and his right side, Lucifer's face rests on his thigh. He has to narrow his eyes, concerned, and then, almost with doubts, he reached a hand to Lucifer's blond hair, and he brushed it carefully with his fingers. Caressing him.

But Lucifer doesn't reply.

He continued shivering every once and then.

Castiel can also sense his brother's wings still manifested, and it didn't matter how damaged they were, they were still a beautiful sight for him.

He doesn't touch them now though, he prefers touching Lucifer's hair.

“You are... cold...”

“I was cold the last time you saw me, little brother,” Lucifer replied. At least he was talking again.

“But you feel colder now.” He blinked and carefully slid his fingers along Lucifer's cheek.

The Morning Star slightly smiles at the touch, at the gentle caress. The comment made him chuckle softly. “It doesn't matter... at least you are warm.” And he leans to the touch, he just can't help it.

Lucifer wanted Castiel closer, and closer. If that was possible, of course.

The next time the Devil trembles, and even whines softly with it, Castiel decided to lean closer, he wrapped his arms around him.

“You think here is... space for me, too?” Castiel whispered. The couch was big enough for both of them to lay down together, that was certain.

The question though, caught Lucifer off guard. “... Why do you ask?”

And Castiel decided it was better to show him with actions instead of words, so he just moved from his place, and laid carefully next to Lucifer on the couch. Lucifer had to lift one of his arms when the little one aimed to cuddle with him, and face him. Castiel had his back against the backrest of the couch, and Lucifer in front of him. He snuggles his face down Lucifer's chin, his arms embraces him, and he tries to pull him closer.

Lucifer feels numb at first, trying the sensation not to swallow him whole, as he feels Castiel so close to him it almost hurt. And when he can feel the younger sliding one of his legs in between his, Lucifer blinked. He gets it, he was trying to give him warmth, and the mere thought of it melts his heart.

“Why... are you doing this?” He had to ask.

“You are cold... Right?” Castiel replied, he had his eyes closed, as if trying to allow himself to enjoy this, getting comfortable in the spot.

“Yes, but...”

“Let me try to make you feel better.”

The eldest's arm accommodates around Castiel, and sighs. He makes himself comfortable as well later, and closed his eyes.

Lucifer wasn't going to deny he appreciated this, it makes him feel good in so many levels.

Castiel doesn't say much after that, and Lucifer has questions, but he doesn't dare to break the silence.

“Did you... talk with Gabriel, brother?” The younger asked in a whisper, curious.

The Devil wasn't sure how to reply at first, or if he should reply at that at all. But Castiel deserved this, more after he had shown himself so caring around him. “Yes.”

“I can feel you are... sad.” Castiel adds. “You can talk to me, if you want.” The younger feels Lucifer smile against his forehead, feels how his lips curled just slightly. And he blushed at that, probably. “I know that your... relationship with the other Archangels is serious, I'm not trying to sound... uhm... disrespectful or-”

“No, it's okay, little brother.” Lucifer interrupted him in a soft whisper. “We ended up talking about the night we had to fight, he told me he didn't want to kill me,” Lucifer chuckles sadly, curling his brows. “I told him my reasons for being there that time, and other things...”

Castiel looks up at Lucifer when the eldest decided to go silent suddenly, he looked thoughtful, and the angel of Thursday can only wonder what was going on in his mind.

“I think he,” Lucifer started again later, furrowing his brows a little, “I doubt of being possible for us to... return to what we were.”

“Why not?”

“He...” He isn't sure why, to be honest. “I'm not sure,” but since Gabriel didn't try to stop him before, he believes he doesn't want him near. “It's just a feeling.” Then again, he could have stayed, and make the younger Archangel listen to him completely.

Thing is he saw Gabriel trying to get away from the situation, so...

Yeah. A _feeling_.

Castiel didn't push the eldest for more explanation, he just sighed, and rested his head against his chest, his arms move carefully not to touch Lucifer's wings, and his palms try to touch other parts of his back, making sure his warmth reaches new places.

And Lucifer shivered at the caressing, making Castiel to doubt of his actions.

“I'm sorry, I-” He tried to apology. “Did I do something that made you feel... uncomfortable?”

But the Devil slightly shook his head, as the muscles flinched against Castiel's touch involuntarily. “... No.” He replied softly, with his lips so close to the other's ear. “It's okay.”

Castiel felt that like a purr.

Probably he imagined that, but it felt good one way or the other, feeling Lucifer talking like this to him, so close and... And then the eldest shifted on his spot, his hips moved forward and closer, making Castiel to feel the accidental friction in lower areas of his own vessel.

This also caused a little gasp out of the younger's lips.

The Devil doesn't seem surprised, but all the opposite. Probably an expected reaction.

Something he was waiting for to happen.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For reasons, I'll have to change the rating in next chapter... I think :'D


	8. Chapter 8

 

His hands are still roaming over the eldest's back and now even his sides. Castiel's touch is shy, and maybe that's what lures Lucifer into wanting more.

The Devil doesn't dare to open his eyes right now, too focused on the younger's caresses, on the warm touch. He realizes soon after that maybe Nick's stubble rubbing softly against Castiel's neck, is the reason why the seraph slightly gasped a moment ago. His lips are as well brushing against the borrowed skin, and Lucifer could tell the little one was getting aroused. He can even smell it, the chemical reaction, the pheromones caused by his vessel, and it is so enticing.

Castiel seems lost in the whole thing, his breathing was calm before, but now that Lucifer has dared to get even closer to him, he can't help but notice the acceleration on his breathing. Such a human reaction, something they have to deal with after being within meat suits in the actuality. And they can allow themselves to enjoy all the feelings and sensations, Lucifer seeming to be more willing to it than the younger Angel. Castiel being the rebellious being that he is, after following paths and emotions only Lucifer dared at the very beginning of times, is curious, and glad to oblige as well.

A soft whine came out of Cass' mouth, and Lucifer is now shifting his position just a little. Warm hands try so desperate to cling to the eldest's body, fingers clenched in his shirt, and damaged wings shivering almost as a response to that.

“It's okay,” Lucifer repeats. A soft, soothing whisper that had Castiel releasing a soft groan against his ear. “It's okay.” He even encourages him to touch him more, and that's when Castiel decided to slide a hand down the Devil's shirt. Lucifer clenched his eyes at the feeling, at how good it feels.

He doesn't want this to end. It has been a while since Lucifer has been this close to anyone, to any other Angel, and it was obvious to notice how much he craves this just by watching him rubbing his body against the other. At how he leans closer. At how he later placed soft kisses along Castiel's neck, and down his jaw. “B-Brother...” Castiel says, and Lucifer has to pull back, facing his brother.

Castiel's eyes look at him with shyness, and a strong desire which not even Castiel must be aware of. Lucifer smiles at that, he smiles at him ever so slightly, that Castiel feels the need to close up the distance, and finally kiss him on the lips.

His lips are cold, but Castiel already knew they would be like that. Lucifer's whole body is cold, but he doesn't mind. Of course he doesn't mind, and besides, Castiel's still an Angel. Cold doesn't affect him, nor scares him. And Lucifer knows that.

The kiss started shy, and it was so lovely. The Morning Star closes his eyes once again as he kissed those lips back. Castiel's chapped lips could be so soft and warm to the touch, the slow movements and little sounds only made Lucifer to press his own against them harder. Pushing his face towards the other, running the tip of his tongue across them to make him realize he wants to enter, that he wanted to explore everything that he has to offer him. And so Castiel allows it. He parts his lips open, and soon can feel Lucifer's soft tongue caressing his. The seraph is not used to the feeling yet, so he accidentally pulls back but Lucifer chases after him, so their lips can meet again. A lovely groan comes out, and Lucifer can't tell if it's his own, or Castiel's.

Feeling, craving for more, the Devil changes their positions. He uses the help of his right arm to pull himself up and over Castiel's body, Castiel even welcomes the action by spreading his legs a little bit more. And Lucifer, following his needs, bucked his hips against Castiel's, once.

The moan that comes out of Cass' mouth teased the Archangel some more. The kiss intensifies. Castiel is panting against his older brother's mouth, reaching a hand to his face, getting to mess up with the blond hair. And Lucifer mimics the action, reaching out to thouch his little brother's face, never abandoning the kiss. The touch is gentle at first, but then Lucifer had to use both hands to grip the seraph's wrists. Trying to dominate him, he pins them against the couch, and now Castiel has both hands on each side of his face.

Lucifer needs friction, and so does Castiel. Both were aware by now of the arousal between their legs, and how it was starting to annoy the pressure between their groins. Jeans, pants, getting tighter while time goes by.

“Lucifer... Lucifer, please,” Lucifer didn't even know Castiel could beg so prettily.

The Devil sighs against his lips, and his hips rock back and forth against the seraph's. He takes his time, he tries not to rush it, but Castiel's impatient moans provoke him to grind his hips slightly harder. Faster.

He can't tell what Castiel is asking for here, maybe he wants him to take him, or just help him to release himself.

Intimacy when it came of Angels back in Heaven, wasn't like this, Lucifer craved to feel Castiel's grace, and he wonders if it would be possible for him to reach it with his own.

Sadly, he can't.

And that frustrates him.

“Lucifer...!” Castiel, reminding him he is still under him, craving for his touch, and Lucifer had to gaze down at him again.

For a moment he thought to say something to him, even his lips parted a little, but words don't come out, and the Devil frowns. It's subtle, but it's there, and Castiel could see it.

Before Castiel could even ask what was going on, Lucifer is yet once again covering his lips with his own.

Only that now, the kiss was something more. It was needy, and slightly angrier than the last one.

Castiel clenches his fists, his wrists are still trapped under the Devil's grip, and he, in a rebel act, pushes his face upwards to intensify the kiss. It could have taken Lucifer by surprise, but instead of that, it only got him wilder.

Another sudden gasp, and Castiel had to pull his head back. Lucifer grinds his hips faster, and he feels he might be close. He can feel Castiel was close by the way his body is responding to his.

Lucifer can't talk, he just wants to hear, his little brother continued groaning underneath him with need, and the look in his eyes almost seemed to beg him freedom. Castiel wanted to do something, help Lucifer with it, and so the eldest obliges.

His grip softened on the wrists, and Castiel was quickly pushing Lucifer off him, causing him to sit on the couch, his back soon landing against the backrest. This gained a surprised look from the Archangel, of course, but before he dared to protest, and take control once again, he stops.

Having Castiel straddling his legs all of the sudden had him forgetting about whatever else he could have had in his mind.

“Castiel,” he whispers, watching the little one getting rid of his pants and underwear, only to return his gaze down at his older brother's icy blue eyes, and wrap his arms around his shoulders. Lucifer is speechless, delighted at the sight. He only looks up, and let him do whatever he pleased. His hands though, were on the younger's thighs, and sliding up to his sides, having a possessive grip over his hips. It was Castiel the one rocking his hips against Lucifer's now, and the Devil is forced to close his eyes and enjoy the ride.

Lips are again brushing against each other, and Cass' fingers tangled on the Devil's blond locks. “I-I need you,” the younger says. He just can't deal with the heat within him anymore. “Please, brother.”

And since the seraph was making himself clear, Lucifer soon reached a hand to the zipper of his jeans, pulled it down, same as his underwear, and soon after his erection was freed, he guided Castiel to sit on him.

Good thing they didn't need any preparation, and as soon Castiel did as asked, a beautiful moan escaped from the deep of his throat.

Calling Lucifer's name, he soon started to move against him.

Up and down he went.

Lucifer helps him by holding his buttocks tight, but then the feeling was too much, and he had to wrap his arms around Castiel's waist.

He can't reach out to feel Castiel's grace, but it's ok.

It's ok.

Maybe if he tries harder, he will.

 

Castiel continued moaning after every thrust.

Lucifer is too overwhelmed, but he can't slow down because his body moves on his own.

“Cas-Castiel...” Panting out his little brother's name, had this one gazing down at him, and kiss him on the lips again.

The kiss is so needy,

so needy...

“Please... please, don't stop!” That was Castiel, and after all, even when Castiel was riding Lucifer, the eldest was in control again when it came about the pace. The eldest was even moving his hips against him, going in and out faster.

Deeper.

Lucifer was about to swear, but bit his tongue before that.

Both were so close...

So close.

Castiel's body tenses up and he is the first one reaching the edge. He comes hard and fast, and untouched.

Lucifer wrapped his arms around him again, holding him close to make sure he is not going anywhere, and after a few thrusts more, he as well reaches his climax.

And dammit, that sure felt good. He knows it could have felt even better, but he is not complaining. He has realized that there was something wrong with him, and that's because, after this, he had decided to believe in this whole thing.

What if this wasn't a lie, after all?

Castiel was with him, that's all what he needs right now, so he hides his face down his little brother's chin, his arms are still wrapped around him, and both take the time to get back to normal. The sensation was still too strong, and they just need a moment.

A moment... and then he believes things are going to get better.

“How are you feeling, brother?”

Lucifer lifts his chin up slightly to meet up with his brother's eyes, and a smile shows at one of the corners of his lips. “I'm good.” Blinks with curiosity, “you?”

“I'm okay,” Castiel's smile is wider. He cradled Lucifer's face with his both hands, and leaned down to give him a soft peck on the lips. “That was... great, and very educational.”

“Really?” Lucifer chuckles, he doesn't want to let go of him.

“Yes,” Castiel tilts his face to one side. “Do you think we could, uhm... repeat this some other time?”

The Devil furrowed his brows at him, amused, adoring the new color on his little brother's cheeks. He ran the tip of his tongue over his lower lip, and ended up biting the same. Leans closer to steal a kiss out from the seraph's mouth, and Castiel is happy to return the favor. “We could, sure. If that's what you want...” The smile always decorating his cold lips.

“Only if you want,” the younger added quickly, and Lucifer laughed softly.

“You know I do.”

 

After exchanging chuckles and smiles, both remained close to each other for the rest of the day. Cuddling, embracing each other until Lucifer fell asleep.

He believes Castiel stayed with him, his clue was that when he opened his eyes two hours later, he was still there, beside him.

Eventually Castiel would have to go, probably the Winchesters required his assistance or something. Lucifer didn't say anything about it, and just leaned closer to kiss him in the mouth as a way to tell him _goodbye_ , or _see you soon_. 

Just after telling him to be careful, and to call him if he needed anything, Castiel leaves.

 

* * *

 

Weeks passed by, and Lucifer wonders if Castiel is okay.

Why hasn't he called him yet?

Perhaps he could be the one to go after him, even if he gets mad at him or something, he had to know if everything was okay. At least he knows he can track him, unlike with the Winchester brothers.

Castiel wasn't in the bunker, that much he knows. Thing is that when he tried to stop near a particular park, someone jumped from behind him and tried to stab him.

Lucifer was fast enough to perceive that, and skilful as he was, managed to return the attack.

He didn't have time to recognize who was the being behind this, but as soon as he realized he had attacked him with an Angel blade, he knew he had killed another brother.

The Angel, with his own blade across his chest, fell back, leaving behind the trace of burnt wings, ashes, and an empty vessel.

Lucifer stepped back, blinking, not getting it. At first he thought that it was a rogue Angel getting to recognize him, thinking he would do Heaven a favor by trying to kill the Devil, for he was their number one enemy.

But then... He couldn't help but to think about Michael.

At the same time he refuses to believe that he had anything to do with it. It had to be a rogue Angel. Michael said he didn't want to fight him, so...

Dropping the Angel blade next to the empty vessel, Lucifer steps back.

More unknown presences appears out of nowhere, and now stand all together a few feet of distance.

Lucifer turns around, and there is a small group of Angels.

“... Lucifer.” One of them said. Most of them showed fear in their eyes, but they were firm into not wanting to step back. The Devil knows they wanted to fight him.

“I do not wish to fight, brothers.” Lucifer said, even raising both palms in a submissive gesture. Though the look in his eyes is calm, and cold, he isn't going to let anyone kill him, of course.

“As Heaven's number one public enemy, you need to be stopped.” Said the same Angel who called after his name at the beginning.

“Does Michael know about this?”

“Michael is not thinking straight since you both got out, we must assume the cage did something to him, but it's okay... We are still here. We will deal with this.”

The Devil narrowed his eyes, furrowing his brows a little. What is he supposed to say to make them understand he is not here to cause any more trouble? “Please... Just don't.”

But no one there seemed to want to listen.

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

 

Blood was dropping from Lucifer's hands, his jeans and shirt stained with it as well, his shoes didn't look any better, neither his face. His chest went in and out. He's still processing what has just happened. Gazing forward there are bodies lying on the ground, vessels, his brothers' vessels. There were also big spots with blood and flesh, and he knows as soon he sees them that those as well used to be human vessels before. Lucifer had to snap his fingers to get rid of the most annoying angels of course, by making them explode when he saw there was no way to make them change their minds, when there was no other solution but to force them to stop. He himself got some injuries from the fight, all because he tried to make the difference... But all was for nothing.

The sight is not a pleasant one. Not even when they tried to kill him at all costs.

His hands are shaking, he just wanted to be left alone, so why didn't they leave him alone?

“Michael,” he whispered, calling out to him. The Morning Star's eyes shone in the emotion of the whole situation, there weren't tears rolling down his eyes just because the little ones weren't that important to him when it comes of relationships, but still, it hurts. The mere idea of seeing himself, fighting his own kind. The kind he loved so much, his brothers whom he missed since he was cast out. And they all hated him now. The love they used to profess to him so long, long ago, lost.

He believes he's going to lose his mind, he just can't keep going like this. This was torture, and he wants to yell and scream out to God to show his face, and explain things as he should to him. He owes him that much, he... “I cannot...” He said, clenching his fists, furrowing his brows, taking a step back. “I can't.” The view was horrible. _Please make it stop_. He even shook his head, and tried to cover his eyes with the palm of one hand. The blood still wet against his fingers, it only makes a mess on his face, but he doesn't care. His breath hitches, he is near to fall on his knees... but someone catches him before it happens.

“Lucifer,” the concern in his voice, that low tone of voice. Michael. “What happened?” Lucifer can feel his arms holding him from behind, wrapping them around his waist when he finally fell on his knees. And Michael didn't seem that confused, even when he asked about the situation. He then switched his position to kneel in front of his brother, but Lucifer can't look up, he can't look into his older brother's eyes.

“They won't let me be,” the younger said. “They won't rest until I'm dead.”

Michael narrowed his eyes, his hands are on Lucifer's shoulders, but slowly going down to stop at his arms. He tries to comfort him. “I know.” Of course he knows. He has been talking to them for a while now, but most of their brothers have gone rogue. “They won't stop, and they are not listening to me either.” The Devil feels selfish for a moment, he wants to ask him to stay, not to leave him alone, it has been so long since he was this close to Michael, since he had his support. And he just feels it would be so unfair if he walked away from him again. He can be allowed to be selfish, right?“I will keep trying, one last time. I will try to make them listen to me.” More if Michael says he won't leave him, that he still wants to keep on trying.

The Light Bearer isn't sure how to reply to that, he looks up at him, and Michael pressed his forehead against his. Lucifer closes his eyes for another brief moment, and then gazes down at the ground. He should tell him not to risk it, think of Michael first.

_Put him first, above you. He's trying to fight for you, then why not do the same?_

“I... don't think it's wise, brother...”

 _  
You're doing it wrong.  
_ _Let him show you that you are important. That you are still important. To him, to anyone else.  
_ _To Castiel._

But words don't come out. No more than the ones that already came out, at least. And Michael smiled slightly at him.

“I owe you that much at least.” The eldest said, and he stood there with him for a while. At least long enough for Lucifer to come back to his senses, and then go back to Heaven.

 

Castiel was still out there somewhere, and even when Lucifer tried to find him, now he couldn't even feel his grace.

He was concerned about him, he even wanted to warn him about the other angels, if they were being so stubborn into wanting to hunt him down, Castiel might as well be in danger. What if they decided to go after him, and punish him for daring to side with the Devil? Castiel hasn't told them that he was on his side specifically, but he has been spending too much time with him, and they could wrong him.

Not that it would help him, but Lucifer decided to pay a short visit to Sam and Dean the next day, maybe they knew something about his little brother, he wasn't going to lose anything by asking.

Dean wasn't around, but Sam was.

“Lucifer... You scared the hell outta me,” the Winchester said, after turning around to face his own bedroom's door. Lucifer was just there, standing by the door frame.

“I'm sorry, it was not my intention,” came the reply.

Sam looked at him, and sighed. He rubs the bridge of his nose, “is there something wrong?” He asked.

“I was wondering if you knew anything about Castiel,” Lucifer says, “it's been weeks since the last time I heard of him.”

The Winchester's eyes are slightly more open now. “No, he hasn't showed himself around in a while, now that you mention it.” Lucifer's idea when it comes of staring at Sam's not so worried face, is that he's used to this with Dean. He confirms it when the boy adds the next; “Cass's not always around us, sometimes he takes days, even weeks to show his face around the bunker.”

Lucifer is still concerned, and that's because he can't feel his brother. Before it was just clear for him to know where he was, but now... Now it was different.

“Look,” Sam adds, “It's Cass. He'll show up sooner or later.”

The Devil glanced up to find the boy's hazel eyes, staring right back at him. “Thing is that I can't feel him like before, his grace, not since yesterday.” Maybe he was in Heaven...? Lucifer thought.

“You think he's in trouble?”

“... That's what I think _now_.” Lucifer narrowed his eyes, and uncrossed his arms.

“Maybe Gabriel knows something, he was frequenting Cass as well, so...” Sam spoke about the idea, knowing it might be a trigger for Lucifer, but if Castiel was that important for him, then any kind of information would do.

He could try.

The Devil looked at Sam, then away from him. He walked as if taking his leave out of the bunker, and Sam, in a strange behaviour, follows him.

Once outside, Sam stands beside him. Lucifer closed his eyes, trying to focus on finding out Gabriel's location. Lucifer can't find him, and the thought of it made him smile.

He has taught him well, hasn't he? Little Gabriel was good enough to hide his presence, even from him.

Sam furrowed his brows, wondering what could have happened for Lucifer to be showing a smile like that, but he didn't find it in him to ask the Devil about that directly.

Lucifer tried again, only that this time he sent him a message, telling him he wanted to talk to him, and in order to let him know about what, he also added it was about Castiel. The Winchester didn't know about that silent message either, but he realized in the end that Lucifer did something, because a minute later he could hear the ruffle of wings behind them.

“Well, well, well...” Gabriel's voice, casual as ever, soon after landing in that place. He smiled at the Winchester whom soon was turning around to face him, and then gazed upon his older brother's back. Pulling out the little sucker out of his mouth, he waited for Lucifer to finally talk to him. The Light Bringer turned around, obviously, and slightly lowered his face. They are used to long pauses, angels weren't like humans, and even when Gabe is used to the apes' behaviour, he also remembers Lucifer's, and his brothers', so he stared back at his older brother, and it's just silence for at least a moment.

A moment long enough to make Sam feel uncomfortable.

“Okay, uhh,” Sam couldn't take the awkward silence anymore, and instead of waiting for Lucifer to say something, he decided to step up. “We thought that maybe you knew something about Cass, he hasn't showed up in weeks, and Lucifer thinks something could have happen to him.”

“Is that so?” The Trickster lifts a brow, gazing up at Sam, then staring back at Lucifer just to check what the boy had just said. Lucifer looked at him as if confirming Sammy's words. “Well... It happens that I do know something,” Gabriel said, crossing his arms and approaching his brother a little, the look in his honey eyes turns serious, and Lucifer has to furrow his brows wondering why was that, expecting the younger to talk to him. “I saw Michael yesterday, bro, and it looked like he was organizing some of the other angels.”

Sam didn't seem to like the sound of that, and he gazed at Lucifer. Lucifer remained with the same expresion, and he wonders if this worried him. Gabriel walked past his older brother, and the Morning Star didn't move at first. His icy blues are settled at some point in the horizon.

“And guess what? Castiel was also there.” Now yes. Lucifer turned around to look at Gabriel after he heard him say that. What did that mean? “I believe he was trying to defend you against them, and when he tried to attack Michael, the other angels stopped him, and then took him back to Heaven. He must be in prison right now, or just being tortured.. You know, the kind of thing that happens when an angel disobeys?”

“How do you know that?” Sam asked.

“Columbo came to me, he was asking for my support. He found out that Michael was planning to go against Lucifer, I don't know the details of it, but apparently Michael wasn't given another choice.” The Trickster was looking at Sam, trying to explain things with the little information that he got, mixed with his own thoughts. “Our brothers probably wanted Mike back as the commander of the heavenly host, but they can't trust a leader that now was trying to side up with the Devil. They still believe that Father wants Michael to get rid of Lucifer, they still see him as the public enemy number one, and that he needs to be destroyed.”

Lucifer is not surprised, at some point... So Michael ended up giving up on him in order to make things right with the host.

There is a chill that runs over his vessel's spine, and he can't help but want to ask his older brother _why?_ After everything he said to him...

The Devil can feel his one true vessel's eyes over him, but he doesn't look back at Sam, he looks at Gabriel.

“Why didn't you help him?” Lucifer's tone is almost bitter, he shouldn't be judging, but he can't help it. “Castiel tried to look out for you.”

“I couldn't do anything, not without a plan, Luci... You know that.”

Michael was there, right... Right. Lucifer closed his eyes, worried.

They took Castiel.

He is probably going through Hell up there. He'd know how Heaven works.

Was he really trying to fight for him? Lucifer seemed to want to ask Gabriel about it, but he doesn't dare. The Trickster managed to see through that though, and smiled a bit.

“I knew Cassie was a little rebel, but I didn't know he was so into you, bro... I mean,” he rolled his eyes and exclaimed with his arms, looking back at Sam. “The guy basically threw himself at Mike, all suicidal like! The hell's wrong with him?”

And Sam turned his gaze back on Lucifer,watching him in silence. It almost startled the Winchester when he saw the Devil finally moving from his spot only to walk away from them. “Lucifer, wait,” not even Sam could understand how that came out of his lips so spontaneously. “Where're you going?”

“After Castiel.”

“Fiiuuu...” Gabriel whistled and chuckled. He soon walked after his brother, and vanishing for just a second, he appeared right in front of him. Placed both palms on Lucifer's chest as if trying to stop him. “Hold on for just a sec, Luci... Do you even have a plan?”

The Morning Star furrowed his eyes almost annoyed. “All I need is a disguise... I can trick them.”

“And what about Mikey? What if you find him?”

“He won't.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because I'm just as good as him.” Lucifer said, proud. “And you know that when it comes of tricks, he cannot surpass me.”

Gabriel would know, wouldn't he?

The Trickster narrowed his eyes and finally smiled at his older brother. “Fine,” he said. “I'll go with you.”

“No,” Lucifer refused. “You are not at your fullest. Michael would find you.”

“Don't underestimate me, bro,” the candy man smirked, wiggling his brows up and down once. “Besides, I could be a good distraction in case he shows up. I could give you a chance to get Cass outta there.”

Gabriel made it possible for Lucifer to actually consider his proposal. And the Winchester as well decided to approach them.

“Hey,” Sam looked at the blond, who now was looking back at him, just like Gabriel. “This's not me trying to underestimate you, Lucifer, but... your vessel,” The boy can see Gabriel opening his eyes a bit more. Right.

“I was wondering about the same, you know,” Gabe said, frowning slightly at his brother. “You can barely hold Nick together, and our abilities works at their best when we're in proper vessels.”

Lucifer released a breath of a laugh, and gazed somewhere else. “Okay. If you are both done, I'd want to start with this now.” It wasn't as if he could get a better vessel anyway.

It wasn't as if Sam would help him with that.

They might have a better relationship than before, the boy talks to him and sometimes even smiles, but the idea of having Sam as a vessel, obviously never crossed the Devil's mind.

“What if I agreed to be your vessel for this?” The Winchester boy spat all of the sudden, and Lucifer froze in place.

 

No...

He didn't hear right.

Sam just didn't-

 

_Do you feel that?_

 

“Excuse me?” The Devil turned his head to look at Sam, and the boy was looking back at him with this... deadly serious look in his hazel eyes.

“I could help you with the condition you let me go afterwards, and besides,” the boy wasn't sure how to put into words the fact he didn't like Michael's behaviour, the fact of him always following rules because the other angels were _that_ single-minded. Lucifer has been behaving since he got out, and apparently he decided to believe him, that he was really just looking for some peace.

But with Michael, that wouldn't be possible. Michael still wanting to fight Lucifer also meant a new Apocalyptic disaster.

“We can try to trap Michael later, so you two don't get to fight.”

 

_It's getting colder._

 

“What makes you believe that we can trap him?” Lucifer squinted at Sam, “you mean the Cage?”

The Winchester didn't reply back, making it obvious that was the idea he had.

And Lucifer bit his own lower lip. He gazes at the sky for just a second, and it doesn't matter...

It doesn't matter how much he gets to hate his older brother, he... he just can't do that to him.

“I'm not going to do it.” Maybe like this, Michael still has time to change. He hasn't experienced the cage's pain like he did. Lucifer knows he's on the edge of insanity at this point... But Michael was still sane. All he needed to change, was his point of view.

What if he himself needed to be stopped in the future...?

Maybe this was for the best.

He stared at Sam, he still can't believe the boy suggested that to him.

It makes him think that...

That _this_ was-

 

_You need to leave..._

 

“What if Michael finds you because you're not strong enough to control your power?” Sam, again. “So hear this... I'm willing to help you. it'd be just for this one thing. If there's a chance for you to use your strenght at its best, then I-”

“This isn't you...” Lucifer chuckles, and steps back.

 

_You need to leave now._

 

“I want to help save Cass, too!” The boy insists, but before he gets to say anything else, Lucifer was gone. He gazed at the sky, then back at Gabriel. “Dammit, Lucifer!”

 

Gabriel tried to communicate with Lucifer right away anyway, and telepathically let him know that he was commiting a big mistake. _Did you just reject Sam, really? What the Hell, Luci... You sure have problems_ , he said.

Lucifer ignored him, and after pulling out the trick he was talking about, he was now disguising his grace to make it look like he was just another angel. This one angel he took care of before daring to go to Heaven, of course, and trapped him using some sigils and enochian magic so he wouldn't escape, nor call for help to any of their brothers.

Once done with that, he was fast to reach out Heaven.

The mere sight of it brought him back memories, it has been so long after all. And it made him nostalgic to see anything had changed. At least from what he could remember.

He walked around carefully, the other angels ignoring him, and mostly treating him as an ally, of course. They referred to him with the name of _Pahaliah_ , and after taking in the memories of this one angel, he just knew how to portray him perfectly.

It didn't take long for Lucifer to make his way towards the prison cells when no one was watching. He saw an angel he didn't remember, trapped in one of the cells, but he continued walking and soon he found Castiel.

He was sitting in a corner, and when he saw Pahaliah, he squinted his eyes.

“Now what...” He said to himself. Lucifer listening, of course.

“Little Thursday, it's me.” The look in Castiel's eyes was one of confusion now, he blinked once, and then tried to get on his feet, and Lucifer behind the image of the vessel Pahaliah was using, let Castiel know it was him. Well, he made himself visible in his true vessel, Nick, but the grace was still different. The little one was fast to understand then that Lucifer came for him, making himself _invisible_.

'Lucifer?' He reached out to him in his head and Lucifer nodded. The Morning star reached both hands through the bars, and took Castiel's face between them, caressing his cheeks with his thumbs.

“I'm getting you out of here.” The eldest gazed around at the cell, Castiel reached his hands to touch his. It was something brief, because soon after that Lucifer was retrieving them, and making appear his archangel blade, he used it to destroy the lock, and open the door.

And Castiel soon finds himself looking at him, stepping closer. Lucifer was the first one wrapping an arm around his little brother, closing his eyes, kissing his forehead while his fingers were tangled on the dark, short locks. The seraph wrapped his arms around the eldest then, and sighed. He was tired, Lucifer could tell. “Brother...”

“Are you okay?” Lucifer asked before anything, and Castiel nodded. Then he pulled slightly his head back, with a concerned expression.

“Why... are you shaking?”

 

_It's so cold..._

 

 _What?_ The eldest wanted to ask, maybe he did with the way he looked at the younger. He realizes he was indeed, trembling. His vessel. Maybe the others were right... He even felt himself feeling weaker. “It's nothing... We need to get out of here, before Michae-”

He didn't realize he had dropped his Archangel blade, peculiar fact was that he never got to hear the steel clashing against the ground.

Castiel has his arms still around him, around his waist, and Lucifer can barely feel one of the palms on his back. He can feel something wet, the faint sound of dripping...

Now he can even taste the blood of his vessel, on his tongue.

 

_So cold..._

 

A choking sound came out of his throat, and he can't move.

He can't move.

And Castiel is the one holding his Archangel blade.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be the last. I will try to update it soon, since I'm already working on it :'D... -Flees!-


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a playlist for this whole thing, wanted to make it in 8tracks, but somehow I couldn't, not sure why links that were supposed to be on youtube didn't work there, when it's all related to Youtube now I think... Maybe I just don't understand the thing. Anyway, have it for now in my youtube account, [here.](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpcamrUgj0Y6uvgBYWjuFTcSiBogRxq4B)  
> I was mostly listening to the track "Cold" doing this chapter, and since the tracks are somehow in order regarding the story, the last two are for chapter 10. This. lol

* * *

 

 

He should have known...

He should have known this would happen.

From all the tortures, this sure had to be one of the worst. It pains him as he never thought it could happen, seeing his little brother there, silent, and with an emotionless expression on his face.

He was the one who stabbed him on the back. Lucifer was still alive only because Castiel didn't aim for his hearth yet, but it was there... So close to it.

 

_You should have known._

_We tried to warn you._

 

“Shut up....” He said to himself, to the voices he ended up developing along the way because of the Cage, because of so many things.

“Are you talking to me, or to the insanity within you, brother?”

“... You're _not_ him... “ Lucifer wanted to tell the hallucination to shut up. Because it had to be that, a hallucination, and he was right in the end. He let himself fall into the lie, the torture of the Cage.

The goddamn place had taken the memories and image of his baby brother to drag him in, and all he can think about is that maybe it was because he was still feeling regretful for what he did to him that day in the chosen field... Because he couldn't control his emotions well, because he let his rage fall upon someone who was like him in some ways. He was regretful of quite a few things, and that one was surely one of the curious ones.

“How can you be sure?” Castiel said, a soft grin forming on his lips for just a second.

One thing was sure; The pain he felt this time was new, to some level at least. Lucifer trying to cling to the usual idea that this was the cage, made him think that it was different because it was the first time the Cage used someone different. Instead of Father, Michael, Gabriel, Sam...

Even when the last three were involved at some level, it wasn't the same.

Because he fell in love with the lie.

Castiel let Lucifer fall to the ground, pulling out the Archangel blade, and the Morning Star rolls to one side, he clenches his eyes in pain... In abandonment... He was just tired of being alone, so alone.

But he refuses to cry. Not again. He was used to the pain, he should be used to the pain. This wasn't new for him, this wasn't-

“Poor Lucifer... Still trying to hold into the hope that this isn't real.” Castiel should shut up, the hallucination, Lucifer reminds himself. Because even as a hallucination, it hurt.

It hurts.

The icy blue eyes looks even more pale, and Lucifer's sight settled before him, he tries to ignore this Castiel.

He just needed to wait, this was it.

The Cage.

This is it. The final moments before he wakes up in the middle of the darkness that was the cage, his prison, his cell in the ninth circle of Hell.

“No one loves you, Lucifer. Michael still believes he has to get rid of you, and you know that deep inside,” Castiel said.

Lucifer didn't reply at that basically because it was true, it was something he could believe. Until that point at least, he thought that maybe, and just maybe, he was facing the real world. Which was just as bad as if it were a lie, because then he would be having this Castiel, and he didn't want to accept it. But then Castiel mentioned things that he thought as true as well, and saw as wrong in this universe...

“Why would Gabriel behave so nice to you in the end, I wonder? Why would Sam say Yes to you?”

“... Shut up.” It was a soft plead, Lucifer's voice is hardly heard.

In his mind, Gabriel was dead. He killed him, even if he was trying to protect himself, he killed him, and he can't forget it. And Sam? There was no way Sam would say Yes to him just because he wanted to help him, he even doubts that Sam would risk that much, not even for Cass.

The two ideas were hard to dig in as well, because for a brief moment, it made him happy.

Gabriel was alive.

Sam for once believed in him.

And Castiel... The idea of him wanting to fight for him as well melted his heart.

“Why would I join your side?” Castiel turned around, gazing down at the Devil laying on the floor. He can see him shivering, again. Shaking like a wet puppy, complaining about the cold. “Not only that, but even fall in love. Yes... It's a great story.”

So it was a _lie_... isn't it?

“Why would Father let you, and Michael, free?”

 

//////////////

 

“ _I'm so disappointed in you, Lucifer...”_

“ _Why? If I spoke as I did it was because you are not making sense, Father.”_

“ _I know what I'm saying, you should obey. Do as I say. Like Michael, like the others. You shouldn't be rebelling against what I asked of you, to all of you.”_

“ _Father... I can't. These human beings are flawed, murderous! And you are asking us to love them more than we love you, and I don't... I don't understand-”_

“ _You shouldn't be questioning my command.”_

“ _I can prove to you that you are wrong-”_

“ _Stop talking.”_

“ _You can't ask this of us, you can't ask this of me...”_

“ _Lucifer...”_

“ _I'm not against the idea of watch over them if that's what you want, but I won't love them_ more _, because I_ can't _... I can't lie to myself, to my sense of justice. They are evil, they are-”_

“ _You don't belong to Heaven anymore, Lucifer. You need to go.”_

“ _You can't be serious... I can't leave. This is my home.”_

“ _Not anymore.”_

“ _You can't... do this to me...”_

...

Why this memory just now...?

He remembers refusing to leave, and then Father asking Michael to deal with the situation. He remembers how he fought his older brother in anger, at the betrayal when not even his brother tried to defend him, to make Father understand his point of view. Nothing... but a kick on the ass.

 

* * *

 

_He couldn't believe his eyes. Gabriel was there, standing in front of him, and even pushed him away before he dared to step on Kali. He can't believe the brother he taught so much in Heaven was now against him. And why?_

“ _Lucifer, you're my brother. And I love you. But you are a great big bag of dicks.”_

“ _What did you just say to me?” He couldn't believe it, really. Now he was mistreating him. And Gabriel spoke some more, he talked about things, things he listened,_ he remembers... Things that helped him later on to understand things he wasn't sure of before. But Gabriel got a few things wrong himself, and when he tried to stop him and not make him fight him, the messenger of God just decided to attack him from the back.

And the memories were just reminders of how _alone_ he has always felt since he was cast out.

 

* * *

 

“ _So you haven't changed a bit, little brother. Always blaming everybody but yourself. We were together. We were happy. But you betrayed me, all of us, and you made our father leave.“_

“ _No one makes Dad do anything. He is doing this to us.“_

“ _You're a monster, Lucifer. And I have to kill you.“_  
  


Why Dean chose Sam, but Michael didn't choose me...?

Was I so unworthy?

My mistake was speaking my mind out loud when I thought something wasn't right. Father made me who I am, so _why_...?

…

* * *

 

“ _Oh, I don't know, Sam. I think it will. I think it'll happen soon. Within six months. And I think it'll happen in Detroit.”_

“ _You listen to me, you son of a bitch. I'm gonna kill you myself, you understand me? I'm going to rip your heart out!”_

Oh, Sam...

...

* * *

 

“ _Castiel. I don't understand why you're fighting me, of all the angels.”_

“ _You really have to ask?”_

“ _I rebelled, I was cast out. You rebelled, you were cast out. Almost all of heaven wants to see me dead, and if they succeed, guess what? You're their new public enemy number one. We're on the same side, like it or not, so why not just serve your own best interests? Which in this case just happen to be mine?”_

“ _I'll **die** first.”_

 

//////////////

 

 

“Shut up,” the Devil tried to yell this time, only that it didn't come out as he wanted. The hallucination kneeled beside Lucifer, but Lucifer was still too lost within his own memories.

Watching his older brother saying he was a monster, and that he had to kill him, still affects him. And he doubts he'll ever see Michael one day, trying to stand by his side.

He remembers Sam's words, and how they hurt even when he knew that part of him was supposed to crave for him, as his other half. He remembers trying to do his best to try to convince him to be by his side, not to fight him. To have him as the partner that was supposed to be, as a companion, one he was promised so long, long ago, someone that was supposed to understand him. He would have given him everything he have wanted, _everything_.

And he remembers Castiel, and how defiantly he turned him down.  
But he liked that, the loyalty he showed...  
He liked to see that rebel side of him, and that he wasn't the only one being cast out of Heaven for disobeying direct orders.

Loneliness is something hard to dig in, even for him.

 

There were tears in his eyes when the hallucination of Castiel finally decided to sink the Archangel blade on his chest again, only that this time it was the right spot. The pain is sharp, and Lucifer closed his eyes, not because of it, but because he was more than ready to let the lie go...

 

The next time he opened his eyes, the vision was familiar as only he knew.

The darkness in the cage didn't change, not one bit.

Thunders and lightning sometimes could be seen through the cracks of the prison's walls, but still... The darkness down there, inside the cage was just too much.

He can't see Michael, but he guesses he's still around, probably dealing with his own hallucination and torment. The Devil had tried before to reach his older brother, but Michael was mad at him, even after falling into the cage together. After all... Lucifer helped Sam to drag Michael with them in that moment. Michael knew that, and it wasn't strange for him to be mad at his brother.

He had a mision, and he failed.

The eldest has failed in so many things at this point, and in some way he believes that maybe it was the right thing to be here, and be punished. But Michael's ideas were... Well, let's say they weren't right, not completely at least. He was doing what he was told, but he was wrong when he chose between what he had to do, instead of what he should do.

He abandoned Lucifer when he begged him not to fight, but he couldn't rebel... How to rebel? He wasn't like him. He always did what Father asked, so...

But Lucifer made it clear in his own way, that he was willing to put his anger aside, as long as they could be together again as brothers. And that's Michael's regret.

And who knows where Adam is, is not as if Lucifer cares. He was probably Michael's responsibility anyway, so he must be around, maybe clinging to the first Archangel ever created. Even when Michael wasn't in condition to watch over anyone right now.

Now the Sword of Heaven can't be seen, Lucifer can't see him, and that's why he had just awaken from this trick, from this lie. He's weak and everything hurts. His vision is blurry, and he's shivering without control. His damaged wings try in vain to provide him some warmth.

But it doesn't work. Not anymore.

Trembling limbs try to drag his body to the corner, fingers, fists, he's against the ground, but he wants to stand.

He can't.

His palms are on the frozen wall, it burns at the touch, but that was normal for him. It was just the everyday down in Hell for him, for anyone who had to waste the rest of a life in this cage.

So Lucifer is on his knees, he whimpers slightly in pain, eyes closed, clenching...

Crying won't do it.

Father is not listening.

He has to accept it once and for all... That he's alone.

No one is coming for him.

No one will come to the rescue.

His chest goes in and out, everytime he has to breathe in and deal with the cage's atmosphere, a faint sound comes out of his throat in protest, it resembles the high-pitched screech of Angel speech, only that it's subtle... So subtle.

And something is changing...

 

_You were an enemy since the beginning, Morning Star._

_You might as well get used to the idea._

 

A soft laugh can be heard in the back of his mind, and he knows he's losing it.

 

_Maybe if you embrace the feeling, something changes...?_

_Well... That makes sense._

_Of course it makes sense._

 

'Maybe Father would listen...'

 

_It's better than staying in this place for all eternity._

_You crave for death, for mercy._

 

'For mercy.'

 

_If you got out, maybe someone else could be the hero._

_This hero might as well end your pain._

 

'Michael is in no condition to be my match...'

 

_Maybe someone else..._

 

The bright in his eyes fades, and the Morning Star is no more. He's lost somewhere within himself, and he can't help it. He doesn't feel like reaching out. To fight it...

When there's no hope.

 

 

 

'Maybe someone else.'

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, this's it.  
> Lucifer was right in the end, this was an angsty story, and I hope the ones who loves Lucifer at least liked it...? It was also my attempt to make some remember that the Cage was made to contain Lucifer, to torture him. That means it's stronger than him, and he basically can't do much inside of it.  
> I'm sorry if there was people waiting for a happy ending, but well... Not in this case (I even threw hints through the course of this story that meant it couldn't end well :'D). Though I was planning to work on a sequel from this story, maybe do something in which Lucifer really gets out of the cage, and make things different. Even try a happy ending for him, hmm??? Let me know what do you think of that, I'd appreciate it~  
> Alright! The chapter wasn't as long as I expected it to be, I was trying to reach the 30k words but I couldn't lol, but since I was also in a hurry, didn't want to make some of you wait that long for the ending since last chapter had an awful cliffhanger xD'
> 
> Well, let me know if you hated this, liked it, blah. Don't be too hard on me though, english isn't my first language I repeat. I'm still practicing. Thanks again to my buddy [Renezinha](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Renezinha), who helped me in this project by beta-reading it all.  
> <3


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